No Idea Where to Take It

Since my first post about Tiger (nine days ago), an incredible amount of information has surfaced in this story.  Obviously, we’ve all seen or heard at least some details.  At this point, I have no idea where to take it.  There’s so much to talk about, I don’t care to get into it.  To me, Tiger has become another Lindsay Lohan/Britney Spears/A-Rod/John&Kate+8 tabloid star.  In light of this, I probably won’t blog more about him or this situation unless something really sticks out to me.

In response to a comment I received, I’d like to clear up a few things.  Here is the comment:

While I certainly do not condone his behavior, I think you are being a bit judgmental – especially when you state that “I won’t forget.” You are carrying a grudge against him and seem as though you are unwilling to forgive him for his transgressions. Hate the sin, not the sinner.

Tiger is at a low point in his life. He obviously has some major problems that he needs to deal with. On the news this morning, I heard reports of even more affairs and a possible addiction to pain killers.

Advent is a time of forgiveness and repentance. We need to forgive him. Tiger needs to repent. Pray that he understands the ramifications of his actions and that he is able to deal with these issues head on (repent).

I’ve discussed the topic of “judgmental” before, but I’ll clear up the confusion.  Typically, the term ‘judgmental’ is misused in our society.  Although I may receive some flack for this, to be judgmental is good… we judge actions of individuals to determine whether or not they would be good friends.  As a parent, I judge the actions of individuals to determine whether or not they can have contact with my children.  We judge decisions, records and work-ethic of political figures to determine whether or not we should vote for them.  We judge moral decisions.  We judge a great deal of things.  In this case, I was judging Tiger’s actions.  The confusion, I believe, comes when judgmental is used in place of “condemning”.  When we condemn others, we put ourselves in the place of Christ, taking the position of “you’re going to hell because of…”.  Condemning others is not our place, nor will it ever be.  Judgment is a virtue, in fact, you can read about it in the Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraph 1806, under the heading of Prudence.

I’m not “unwilling to forgive” Tiger, nor am I carrying a grudge.  My point in the previous post about Tiger was that he is in the lime light and can’t simply turn that off because he made some mistakes.  His actions (morally right, wrong or indifferent) will have lasting effects on society.  You may say I’m stretching it here, but there will be men who think to themselves, and some who actually say the words out loud, “Tiger did it, it’s okay for me to do it too”.  His influence is (was) too powerful for that not to happen.

Also mentioned was the topic of forgiveness.  Yes, we are in Advent; it’s not a time of forgiveness or repentance, as stated in the comment.  Advent is a time of preparation and expectancy for the coming birth of the Christ child.  So, let’s look at this in the context of the Tiger situation, how does Advent play a role in how we look at everything?  First off, it’s not my place to forgive him, he has not trespassed against me… that’s for God and Tiger’s wife Elin.  Next, it was necessary that Jesus came into this world, to unite us to the Father because of our failings.  Our (mankind’s) sins were so grave that God Himself HAD to take human form, lowering Himself to human status, in order to redeem us.  Tiger, the same as all of us, needs God’s grace, His forgiveness and His mercy.  In this time of suffering and struggle for Tiger, I wish him healing.  I pray for a conversion of his soul.  Tiger obviously needs God, he might not know it yet, but he needs him.  And yes, you’re right, “hate the sin, love the sinner”.

I highly recommend that we all take a break from this tabloid saga and concentrate on more important things, like manning up!

Man up!

Do You Think You’re Better Than the Men You Write About?

A man recently asked me the question (from the title):

“Dave, so when you’re writing about stuff on your blog, do you think you’re better than the men you write about?  For instance, the dad that left his family to play arcade games?”

My response to the question is good for everyone to read and understand, and I want to be clear about my reasons for my blog posts.  My response to him was:

When I write my posts, and when I critique a man, I critique not the man himself, but his action(s).  In some cases, I see something that is clearly not manly and I write about it.  Sometimes, I see something that is manly, and I write about that.  In either case, I want to highlight the “thing” done or not done.  Each man has the same dignity, but not all men live up to the calling of that dignity.

It is never my intention to condemn a man, regardless of his actions.  Condemnation isn’t for man, only God.

I really appreciate questions like this because I want my readers to fully understand me and my position on manliness.  If you have questions, comments, suggestions or concerns, please send them my way and I will be happy to respond.