REPOST – Back to Campus

Repost from August 2009, with a few additions, for the college-aged young men out there…

With most schools starting recently (or soon), I thought it would be good to address some issues about how a TrueMan behaves on campus.  A college campus, as we all know, can be a hostile place for an ardent follower of Christ.  It can be a treacherous minefield of explosive situations, abusive and vulgar language, uncomfortable environments, and disagreements with unbelievers.  In order to deal with these difficult issues, here are a couple suggestions.

• Be yourself.  If you love and serve God, don’t be ashamed of it.  Live it out, your witness will come through – people will want what you have.
• Don’t give in to negative peer pressure.  Negative peer pressure is stupid… Real friends don’t force you into bad situations and surely don’t lead you into sin.  We call these people “nasty friends”.  If you’ve got ’em, get rid of ’em.  Don’t ruin your life holding on to people who are ruining theirs.
• If you are struggling, and think that you’ve got it bad or that you’re really suffering for the increase of the Kingdom, read about St Paul in 2 Corinthians 11/12.  That’s some good perspective, huh?!
• There’s a big difference between being a strong Catholic man who stands for something good as compared to a “culturally manly” guy who wants the “glamorous” lifestyle of money, power, women and stuff.  College campus life increases these bad desires exponentially.
• Many women on your college campus won’t understand the chivalry you extend to them.  Do it anyway, with charity and a smile.  Be a radical change on your campus.
• Being a TrueMan doesn’t mean you can’t have anything to drink, or that you can’t go to any parties.  It means that you put yourself in good situations, that point you towards heaven and you act in moderation and with prudence.  Remember, Jesus hung out with sinners, but not when they were sinning.  (*Keep in mind that a TrueMan abides by the law, and whether you agree with the drinking-age in the US or not, it is the law.  A TrueMan wouldn’t risk it.  If you’re underage, just say no.)
• Strive for excellence in all things.  Start by being sober and chaste.  If you conquer these two areas, you’re well on your way.
• As much as it seems untrue, women don’t want to marry the dirtball, drunkard, C-minus-student types.  They want a gentleman, a man who’s going to provide for them, a man who loves them and shows their love by respecting them and by being self-sacrificing.  They want a man who is going to be a great dad and a hard worker.  There’s nothing wrong with stacking the deck on this topic!  Put all the cards in your favor from the get-go!

All in all, college is a great time for a young man.  Live it up.  Enjoy it.  In all things, be focused on Christ, live virtue and especially, live joy.

TrueMan up!

Don’t Write Him Off

I’m certainly guilty of it.  I imagine most of you are, too.  We see a person, and make a snap judgment.  “They must be _________.” (fill in the blank.)  It doesn’t matter what the snap judgment is, it matters because we just made it.  We broke one of the cardinal-cliché-rules… we judged a book by its cover.  Sure, sometimes our assumptions are correct.  Other times, maybe most of the time, we are dead wrong.  In the evangelization world, being dead wrong can cost people their souls.

 Back in the day, I’m certain that people judged my cover properly… there wasn’t much of a secret that I was the least likely candidate for anyone to invest in, but thankfully, they went beyond my cover and saw the potential on the inside.  My “book cover” screamed of anti-Catholic sentiment, with a splash of rage, a hefty dose of pride, a heaping handful of aggression, an overflowing cup of womanizing, and a host of other horrible traits.  And that was just what was on the surface that people could see!  I was pretty far gone, yet people saw enough hope in the risen Lord that He could get to me, and He did.  I am forever grateful to the people who didn’t give up on me, and want to urge you to remember that you can’t simply write a man off because he appears a certain way, or even acts a certain way.

Who might I be talking about?  Men who are overly rich, men who are overly poor.  Men who are into heavy rock, or into gangster rap.  It might be men who spend copious amounts of time in the gym, or at the firing range, or in the garage, or at the clubs.  How about men who use four letter words every third word?  It might be men who’ve never graced the doors of a church, or the man sitting in the pew behind you in Mass every week.  Men with kids, men without.  Men who smoke, men who drink.  Men with tattoos, men with scars.  Men who wear boots, men who carry guns.  Men who drive sports cars, or jacked up trucks, or an old jalopy.  My point… it doesn’t matter – each man has the same calling to TrueManhood.

 As with everything, we should look to Christ.  Who did He invest in?  Jesus spent time, and befriended, some of the worst dudes around.  He knew what He was doing, and look what those men did!  Take the various fishermen, or the tax-collector, or even the worst persecutor of Christians of the time.  Jesus went after them, conquered their hearts, and commissioned them to go out and make disciples of all nations.  These ruffians, thugs, scallywags, and barbarians became the greatest evangelists of all time.  Thank the Lord that He didn’t write them off!

 So here’s an action-challenge: assess your scope of influence, determining the men in that scope, whether family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, strangers, etc. and make a list of any/all men that you’ve written off.  By writing them off, you’ve missed opportunities to talk to them, to learn about them (or learn from them), to ask them questions, to give them the benefit of the doubt, etc.  By writing them off, you’ve also destroyed the opportunity to serve them, love them, and to call them to something higher in life.  Take this list – whether it be 1 man or 20 – and begin to pray for each man by name.  In your prayer, ask God to guide your interactions (especially the next one) and to give you the strength to say or do what is right.  You may be the only opportunity that man has to learn about Jesus Christ, the TrueMan.  And you never know, he may be the next great evangelist that the world needs.

 When my college friends chose not to write me off, it allowed a seed to blossom into many fruitful things.  Had they written me off, and not seen the potential in me, only God knows where I would have been.  I’m sure it wouldn’t be good, and I’m sure that many of the bad decisions I was making would have been amplified and continued.  Thankfully, my conversion towards Christ changed me, brought me back into His Universal Church, led me to my wife and our four beautiful children.  Thankfully, my conversion led to these years of service in ministry – hopefully doing the greatest good, of loving people and telling the Good News – and especially this ministry, TrueManhood Men’s Ministry.

 Regardless of what a man is “in to”, he is called to holiness, to union with God.  God the Father desires to have a relationship with His son.  It may take you or me to introduce the son to his Father.  Don’t shy away from the opportunities to reach out to even the least likely candidates.

 TrueMan up!