In Response – Not the Point

I recently received a comment on one of my posts, “That Blue One’s the Boy One”.  The commentor, as you can read below in red, misses the point.

The color examples don’t make any sense. Attributing color to gender is arbitrary. It’s not an instinct. It’s learned. Before the 20th century, most babies were dressed in white because it could withstand hot washes. In the 1920’s in the US, pink was for boys and blue was for girls. Pink was considered a watered down shade of red, think blood and blue was considered dainty because it was the color of the sky and water. The French dressed girls in pink and the Germans dressed boys in pink. It’s meaningless. Think dresses are for girls?  Not in this country. Most boys wore dresses in the late 1800’s because fabric was scarce and they grew out of pants too quickly. As for your “men and women are different” arguments, the scientific research has shown that there are more within-group differences than between-group differences for men and women aside from a few physiological differences. The reason that there is a difference is because society has created different rules for different genders. From looking around your website, I guarantee what I am writing won’t make a difference and you probably won’t give it a second thought, but it goes against everything that we know about our society. This site seems to be a giant amalgamation of stereotypical and baseless opinions. It is well-designed though and the layout is phenomenal. I hope that some healthier examples of masculinity, fatherhood and mentoring make their way to your site in the future.

Allow me to respond to Jerrod.  First off, thanks for the comment.  Secondly, you’re missing the point in the first half of your comment.  It wasn’t about the color, which I clearly stated in my original post.  You bring up some other points that need clarification.

1. The “men and women argument” isn’t my argument.  I’m merely stating what others (namely, John Paul the Great; one of the greatest philosophers and peacemakers in human history) have already worked out extensively.  To say that there are “more within-group differences than between-group differences” is quite simply, false.  Your scientific research is flawed.  If you’d like to email me personally, I’m happy to take a look at what you are using as your source(s).
2. What you wrote is very important to me.  What you wrote is, in part, why I have this website.  I’m interested in bringing to light the truths of manhood so that our society can return to a properly functioning society.  As of now, in our post-modern society, we do not function properly as a whole.  This is mainly because males fail to live up to TrueManhood.  I’m working to change that.  You say that my website “goes against everything we know about our society.”  You’re correct, I’m working to fight the culture we live in.  Sin rules our world, and in order for society to thrive, we must fight our tendency toward sin.  To say “what we know about our society” implies that what our society does/thinks is correct.  What we think is correct, is not.  Our society needs conversion of heart to the source of life – Jesus Christ.
3. As for the site being a “giant amalgamation of stereotypes and baseless opinions”, I disagree.  My articles are based in Catholic truth, the fullness of truth.  That’s a giant topic, so I don’t guess we can get into it here.  I’m fighting the stereotypes of what is expected of males in our society – just read any of the articles I write about commercials we see.  I’m guessing you probably haven’t really read many of my articles, or maybe that you don’t understand them.  My apologies.  And yes, while my articles are opinion, they are not baseless.  My opinions are in line with the Church (many bishops and priests support my website) and are rooted in the understanding of virtue as a way of life.  If you’re interested in reading more about virtue, type VIRTUE in the search box and get to reading – there’s lots there.  Specifically, you can check out “TrueManhood’s Guide to Virtue”.
4. I appreciate the comments about the layout and design.  I work hard to keep the sight going.  (And, I’m always working on new stuff, and want more comments of what everyone is hoping for!)
5. Finally Jerrod, from your last sentence, I’d like to know what you think is a “healthier example of masculinity, fatherhood and mentoring…”  Thanks.

Man up!

"Take Time to Be a Dad Today"

Today, I was running at the gym and saw a commercial on ESPN for the National Fatherhood Initiative.  I was really impressed, especially to see it on ESPN – a channel dedicated to sports and encouraging men to sit and watch them every hour of the day (boooo).  I came home and searched for it, finding the website and some commercial clips.  Check out the main National Fatherhood Initiative site.  To see the commercials, click Public Service Announcements.  (Note: they’ve gotta be great, considering that the voice overs are from Darth Vadar’s voice – James Earl Jones and from Magnum P.I. – Tom Selleck.)  They’ve got a great slogan: “Take Time to Be a Dad Today”.  Sometimes, that’s all it takes – time.

Here are two of them:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5bcsR74oUI]

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MpFPI2gATnw]

Man up!

A Month for Fathers

June  is here.  Father’s Day is coming up and I want to take this month to write frequently about fathers, about what a father should be and other topics that pertain to fatherhood.  Today’s topic will cover a sensitive issue of abortion.  Recently, we received the regular newsletter from our local Citizen’s For Life group.  Inside contained some startling information about a father’s role in the abortion process.  Here’s what it says:

FATHERS PLAY KEY ROLE IN ABORTION  – from LifeLine, June 2009

A study published in the International ‘Journal of Mental Health & Addiction’ has found that the relationship between women and their partners and the level of support provided by the fathers are important factors in whether or not the woman aborts their baby.

The study sample was drawn from hospitals in 16 cities around the country, which had high numbers of births to unmarried women.

The final sample was of families already having one child.  The study looked at the reasons women chose childbirth or abortion for their subsequent pregnancy, and examined the decision-making process in the context of her relationship with the father of the child.

No other research on abortion decision-making has taken the family context into account.

This is an especially important issue for our future consideration, since so many abortions are currently performed on women with other living children, implying the presence of the father of the children.

The results of the study indicated that the most important factors in determing the women’s choice to abort a second pregnancy were those associated with the father’s inability – or unwillingness – to provide assistance in rearing the first child.

It found that mothers who were married to the father were significantly more likely to deliver the baby.

The prevailing opinion that women abort because of poverty and financial considerations ran counter in this study.  Mothers, instead, based their decision on whether they would be supported in their role as a mother by a father.

Study results support the idea that it requires both a committed mother and father to assure the choice to deliver and care for a child.

[Excerpts from: LifeNews.com 1-16-09, Author Dr Wanda Franz]

I'm Watching You Dad

I thought that this video went well as a “part 2” to my last post. 

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MMEwl9dCt8]

Man up!

Fatherhood Friday – The Love of a Father

I have two daughters.  Lily and Emma.  They are amazing and sweet little children.  They mean the world to me.  I would do anything for them.  As I think about how I treat them… with such love and admiration, with kisses and hugs, snuggles and story time, prayer and discipline… I know, without a doubt, that my relationship with them is the most important relationship they will ever have.  This isn’t to toot my own horn!  Expand it in a broad sense: the most important relationship any young girl has is with her father.  I do not take this responsibility lightly.  At the foundation of all of their coming relationships (friendship/romantic/work/personal/professional) is the love that I show them.  The burden lies solely on my shoulders, to show them how wonderful and precious they are.  It’s my responsibility, as their protector and defender, to prepare them for the world.  I must encourage them and build them up.  I must help them to see the jewel that they are, the treasure that they are, the perfect creation that they are.  A huge part in showing them this love is by loving my wife in the way that proves to all three of them that my wife is a jewel, a treasure and a perfect creation.

It is my goal, in my relationship with my girls, to have them set their bar high, to never settle, to never feel inferior or to never doubt their abilities.  This is a monstrous goal.  It is a gigantic task.

Man up!

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