Scandal, Scandal Everywhere

Does anyone else feel like Satan is really attacking the Church hard the past few weeks?  And I don’t just mean his normal tactics; I’m talking huge attacks.  He’s shaking things up close to the foundation and doing major damage in the hearts and minds of many wayward Catholics around the world.  It seems like everywhere I look, every article that gets sent to me and every post about the Church on Facebook… it’s all slander, and scandal.  In the past day, I read about 12 Catholic priests in South America coming out in favor of ‘gay rights’, about a former Lutheran pastor (married, with 6 children) becoming a Catholic priest and about the controversial statements made by Cardinal Schonborn of Vienna, Austria.  These stories don’t shake my faith, but they spark doubt and confusion in the minds of many.

For those who don’t believe in Satan (the Prince of Lies), he exists.  You don’t have to believe in him in order for him to exist.  Actually, the more you don’t believe in him, the less you acknowledge his presence, the more work he can do in your life.  He’s attacking the Church now, I believe, because people’s faith is weak and moral relativism is at an all-time high.  Being aware of where you stand is essential in fighting Satan.

What are we to do about these attacks?  How can one man, a guy like me, do anything to ‘right wrongs’ in the Church?  How can I make a large enough impact to justify doing even one small thing?  The answer starts at home.  You MUST be living as an authentic disciple of Christ.  If you are married, you must be encouraging your wife to do the same.  If you have children, you must raise them in the faith.  This is not a faith of ‘pick-and-choose’… your faith must be solid and unwaivering.  Our faith isn’t individual to us.  It is universal, to the entire Church.  That prevents us from thinking we can make decisions of faith and morals on our own.  If you’re living the faith at home, it translates into living it in the workplace, during leisure time and on vacation (at least it should.)  If we live authentic lives for Christ, others will see and will want the joy that we have.  This may seem too simplistic for some, but the truth of the matter is that arguing with people about scandals in the Church rarely allows for conversion, and only distances their desire for God.

With all of the scandals hitting the news lately, I encourage all of us to pray heartily for the Church.  It is times such as these that we must remain faithful and firm in our resolution to defend against evil.

TrueMan up!

Keep Fighting

Men, Whether you’ve been on the battle field for a long time or have just begun the fight, I want to encourage you to continue to fight! The devil is strategic in how he attacks you and a period of freedom (any amount of time) can at times play games with a man’s mind, allowing him a sense of “I’m done with this” – that’s called complacency.  No matter how long you’ve experienced freedom (1 day or 10 years), you can never let your guard down.  The path to holiness is paved by discipline and you must remain disciplined in order to successfully achieve holiness.  Holiness, a complete imitation of Christ, in Heaven is our goal.  If you’re reading TrueManhood for the first time, then you may not know what I’m talking about.  Here at TrueManhood, we directly attack the evils of the culture, one of those being a most grave evil – pornography.

For men who are reading this for the first time (or for someone who knows a man who has an addiction to pornography but hasn’t yet sought help), please visit the links posted below to get started in battling your addiction.  If you’ve already seen all these resources, it may be time to read them again.  Take back your life and strive for TrueManhood – a life of virtue in Christ Jesus.

• For “TrueManhood’s 5 Step Plan to Overcoming an Addiction to Pornography” Click HERE.
• To read other articles about the fight against pornography, type in ‘PORN‘ or ‘PORNOGRAPHY‘ in the search box towards the upper right.
• For Porn Addiction Resources, Click HERE.
• For “TrueManhood’s Guide to Virtue” Click HERE.
• To view videos of my talks against pornography addiction, Click HERE.
• For free anti-porn software, click HERE.
• If at anytime you need assistance with your battle, email me directly at Dave@TrueManhood.com.

TrueMan up!

Tuesdays with Daddy – A Kid Pouts, but a Man Shouldn’t

This morning, my oldest daughter woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  From her nap this afternoon, she woke up on the wrong side of the bed, again.  Nothing was right for her all day.  She didn’t want to play when playtime was suggested.  She didn’t want to eat, when meals were prepared.  She didn’t want to clean up, she didn’t want to nap, she didn’t want to play, she didn’t want to pray.  Then, to top it all off, a huge snow storm hit our region and is potentially preventing us from getting to the airport and flying to visit family – she was not happy about these details.  She reacts and her reaction is to pout, throw a tantrum and fuss.  A man shouldn’t react that way.

As a grown up (or as a “growing” up), we must realize that our reactions to tough situations should be even keeled.  More properly put, our reactions should be “ordered”.  I recently watched a program on prison inmates.  The inmates seemed pretty calm and easy to get along with while on camera, but unruly, defiant and violent when someone made them mad.  They looked like a little kid who wasn’t getting their way, and anyone in their way paid the price.  A TrueMan reacts differently.

When I was younger, my reactions to tough situations were pitiful.  As I’ve grown older with age, and as I’ve come out the other side of a really bad rage problem, it has become very clear to me that men of virtue, ie: TrueMen, don’t allow their emotions to determine how they act.  TrueMen act out of truth… with responsible reactions.  It’s a good thing to work on.

Man up!

Tuesdays with Daddy – “You Really Do Reap What You Sow”

Another installment of “Tuesdays with Daddy”.  For those who don’t know, I stay home with my two young daughters on Tuesdays and always have something important to blog about.

Today, I realized that we really do reap what we sow.  This morning, as I woke up with my two year old, I was amazed at how sweet she was.  She was saying things to me, like, “Daddy, may I please have some more cereal?” and “Daddy, I love you, VERY MUCH!” and “Daddy, you’re wonderful!”

Do you see where I’m going with this?  She’s repeating back to me phrases and statements (tone is important here, too) that I tell her often.  If I regularly talked to her in rough words, or words that aren’t loving, caring and sincere, she would talk to me that way too.  Eventually, she would probably speak to her teachers, coaches and friends in that same manner.  Instead, I choose to speak to her in the way I want her to speak to me and the rest of the world – lovingly.  (Be assured, I am firm when I need to be firm and scold when I need to scold.)

We really do reap what we sow.  And we’re constantly being watched.  With my girls, I’m being watched all the time.  As a follower of Christ, I simply cannot choose to abandon this responsibility.  I MUST work to exemplify Christ at all times.  I drop the ball quite often (as many of you know) but continue to get up and fight.  It’s a lot of responsibility, but if we expect to see change in our world for God, we must take this challenge on.

In your own life, I challenge you to figure out what you are sowing.  Are you sowing love?  Are you sowing anger, hatred, lust?  We really do reap what we sow.

Man up!

You Can’t Fight Based on Fear

Over the years, in dealing with my addiction to pornography, I’ve realized some pretty profound things.  Things about myself, about addiction, the pornography industry and how to overcome this incredible evil.  [If you haven’t read through my 5 Step Plan to Overcoming an Addiction to Porn, please click HERE before you continue reading this post.  – We’ll wait.]  As you know, I liken this sin to a battle, an incredible fight that we enter into with evil.  A man must enter into this fight aggressively in order to come out victorious.  A thought I’ve had lately is that we can’t fight out of fear.

We can’t fight an addiction to porn (or any addiction) because we fear things – the fear of being caught, the fear of ruining a relationship, the fear of having to confess our sins (again), the fear of our work finding inappropriate material on their computer, the fear of failing, the fear of giving in to the temptation, etc.  A soldier doesn’t go into battle fearful – he goes in confident in his training, his abilities and his leadership.  He knows that because of the work he’s put in up to this point (the training), that he’ll prevail.  He trusts his leadership to guide him through this tough time, quite possibly the hardest thing he’s ever done, or ever will do.  We’re the same way, except here, our salvation is on the line.

Fight aggressively, fight with honor, fight for your life.  Go into this battle knowing that you have God on your side, that you can accomplish all things through Him (Philippians 4:13) and that YOU WILL BE VICTORIOUS!

There is a fear that is healthy for us, in this battle… the fear of offending God.  The use of pornography (and typically the sexual behavior that stems from its use) is sin – mortal sin.  We greatly offend God; through our actions, we turn away from God’s love.  We lose all trust in God.  Sin is a real thing, a serious thing.  Sin removes charity from our heart and separates us from God.  Fearing the loss of salvation (by our choices and actions) is a healthy fear to have.

Man up!

Can you Believe it?

Believe it… the pornography industry is a giant, preying on unsuspecting victims.  Once it has a grip, it isn’t likely to let go, unless the prey decides to fight back.  This “fighting back” can’t be weak.  It must be calculated, planned and executed perfectly in order for the battle to be won. 

For many years, I was held captive by an incredible grip… a grip that left marks, wounds and scars; not to mention emotional memories.  For years, I lay helpless to pornography’s grasp.  I knew not where to turn, or how to start fighting.  Thanks to my brothers-in-Christ, I was able to begin fighting back and eventually, through God’s mercy, forgiveness and strength, I overcame the grip and applied a strangle-hold back upon my aggressor.  I’m not out of the woods yet (I’m still a living, breathing man!)… but my life is no longer controlled by porn.

The porn industry portrays itself as normal, as something “everybody does”.  It’s makes men think that it’s completely normal to injest incredibly large doses of smut, lust and obscenity.  Guess what, it’s not normal.  We were created for greatness, not for mediocrity and what “everybody else is doing”.  We’re called to stand and defend, especially against sly predators.  (Remember how cunning the serpent was in the garden with Adam and Eve?) 

If you are currently in porn’s grasp, there are ways out.  Make sure you check out the tab “Fighting Porn” located at the top of the page for some initial advice and help.  If, at any time, you need someone to talk to, contact me.  A True Man fights back against the things in life that are temptations and conduits to sin.

Man up!

Manliness in the Modern Church

Saturday morning, I spoke at a local Men’s Breakfast.  The room was full.  The breakfast was hot (and tasty).  It was good to see Catholic men coming together to join in brotherhood and to be inspired by a message.  The ages ranged from a young teen boy all the way to some wise-men in their 80’s.  95% of the men in the room were fathers.  I spoke about “Manliness in the Modern Church”. 

The reality of it all is that our Church in America has been overrun by the feminist movement of the 1960’s.  The sexual revolution “revolutionized” the decay of gender roles… and in the Church, it spread like wild fire.  Manly women and feminine men (<– oxymorons, I know).  What we see now is a Church where men are overly passive (if they go at all) and the brunt of the work is accomplished because of women.  It sets a terrible example for our families; the children within the Church don’t understand what a man is.  The boys go astray because they have no idea what it means to be a man and the girls follow after them… that’s what society tells them is normal and good.

The purpose of my talk was NOT AT ALL to bash women or to say that women shouldn’t do anything in the Church… on the contrary.  [Without women in the Church who saw a wide-open-gap that needed filled, our Church would be in a much worse position than it already is.]  The purpose was to call men to be men, to light a fire in their souls to live VIRTUOUS lives!  To step up and LEAD!  To FIGHT and DEFEND the Church, her people (women and children especially) and their own spirituality!  Christ didn’t ask the apostles to sit around and wait for people to ask them what they believed.  He commissioned them to action – “Come and Follow Me” – “Be fishers of men”.

The talk was well received and I think that it inspired these men to go forth and live out a virtuous, manly life.  TrueManhood!

Man up!

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