Some of My Favorite Daddy Moments

A lot of what I write about is fairly heavy, and usually very serious.  I think that it’s important in all of the seriousness to take a step back from time to time and keep things in perspective.  When I allow myself to do this, it almost undoubtedly directs my thoughts to what’s really important in my life; my children.

Lately, I’ve been concentrating on being less of a nagging parent, being more positive in my speech to my children, and picking my battles.  Recently, I took my three oldest children to the local lake to go fishing.  It was the heat of the afternoon and we didn’t have the right bait.  We were fishing from the bank, and in an area with little to no habitat where fish like to live, move, and eat.  The odds were against us.  We fished (ie: practiced their casting and reeling skills – they got pretty good!) for over an hour, then the kids took their shoes off, waded into the water, and attempted to skip rocks.  It was a blast.  I enjoyed just being there with them, with no agenda, no plans, no rules, just fun.

Now that the weather is warmer, we’ve been doing a lot of this lately.  Playing outside with bikes and scooters, spending lots of time at local parks, and so on.  What I love about this time with them is that we’re making memories.  My kids will either remember how much I worked or how much time I played with them.  I want the work to be there, obviously it has to be, but I also NEED the play time to be there as well.  We’ve also been spending more time in prayer together, which has been awesome.  I instituted a new rule… whenever we see our friend (a true prayer warrior) over at the church, which we live across from, we’re going in too.  She’s there every. single. day. and so are we now.

As summer break gets ramped up, we have plans for more baseball, swimming, bike riding, camping (I’m most excited about camping!), and even some late spring-season turkey hunting.  I hope to update everyone on those as we go.

So dads… and men who desire to be a dad someday… don’t remove the seriousness of life and don’t abdicate your responsibilities, but make time for the fun things with your kids.  I constantly hear parents of older children (ie: grandparents) talking about “how fast time flies” and “how fast they grow up.”  I don’t want to wake up one day and have missed out.  This is my only chance.

PS: speaking of being a fun dad… check out the comedian @jimgaffigan, he’s hilarious and often talks about his kids.  A father of 5, he knows how to keep it light and fun.

TrueMan up!

REPOST: She Thinks We’re Just Fishin’

I’m reposting this story from about three years ago.  Fishing season is upon us, and my daughters are anxious to get out again soon.  And, if that wasn’t enough, my oldest daughter is growing up so quickly.  She absolutely rocked out a solo tonight at her school choir concert, and it made me think of the times we spent singing the song that I talk about later in the post.  Here goes:

“This morning, I took my daughters fishing.  They have experienced a bit of fishing before, but this was their first time with me.  Just the three of us went; 2yr old Emma, 3yr old Lily and Daddy.  We drove about 7 minutes to the local lake.  I taught them how to put the rods together, then switched the lefty reel to a righty.  We then baited a hook (lure) and I showed them how to cast and reel.  They took turns and ultimately, had a great time.  We didn’t stay long.  They were more interested in their ice cold water and snack that waited for them in my truck and not so much in casting and sitting still in the hot summer sun.  It was all good.

I had prepared them for this “fishing trip” the night before.  They woke up excited and were ready to go fairly early.  They thought we were going to catch huge fish, but I knew better.  I wasn’t using the right lures and the rods were way too big for them.  Again, it was all good.

It wasn’t about catching fish.  [If it was, they’d call it ‘catching’ instead of ‘fishing’.]  It was about my daughters having time with their father, and it was about their father having time with his daughters.  Time, that’s really all.  And memories.  When’s the last time you took time to make memories with your children?  Your godchildren?  Your nephews/nieces?  Your grandkids?  Go make memories.  Oh, and on the way home from fishing… we stopped in at the adoration chapel at our church for a few minutes of silent prayer with Jesus.  Overall, it was a great morning.

Trace Adkins has a great song that became “Lily’s song”, and I sing it to her all the time.  Here’s the video.  Speaks to what I’m talking about here.  Thanks, Trace.”

TrueMan up!

Being Daddy on Vacation

I apologize for the long delay between posts.  Since I’ve started this blogsite, I haven’t had a break this long between articles, so thanks for bearing with me. 

I’ve been on vacation with my girls, far away from most of civilization at a great lake in (the middle of) the middle-of-nowhere Montana.  It was great.

While on vacation, it’s important for a father to realize that he doesn’t stop being a Daddy or a husband.  It would have been easy for me to have wanted to stay on the ATVs all day, work on the sail boat, go out fishing or shooting or to hang out just with the other guys.  It would have been easy to neglect my wife and children and do what I wanted to do.  Instead, I made the choice to put them first, and to put my selfish desires to the side.  I ended up having plenty of time on the ATVs (which, by the way, were incredible… see above picture) because I took the girls with me.  I made the loving choice to keep my priorities in line.  We had lots of time together playing, having fun, flying kites, going for walks, playing games and eating like kings and queens. 

It’s also easy (anytime really, but especially on vacation) to neglect my wife.  I strive to make her my top priority, but sometimes I struggle at showing her in the way the she needs to hear it or see it through my actions.  Vacation throws a wrench in everything because a guy is out of his element.  It’s not easy to be romantic, thoughtful or sensitive when there are lots of other adults and children running around.  That’s why its important to think ahead, to plan and to be strategic about the little things.  The little things, especially when it’s out of the normal operating area (home), go a really long way with women.  You know what else goes a long way with women?  When their husbands go out of their way to make special time for their children.  Now, before someone jumps down my throat for being insensitive and seeming like I’m saying that a father should only do what he should because it’ll keep the Mrs. happy and off his case, let me assure my readers that I’m simply saying that wives love their husbands for many reasons… one happens to be when a husband takes special time to be with his children.  I’m also not saying that a husband/father shouldn’t have time with the guys, or doing fun things.  I’m saying that those events can’t be the priority.

So, as you go on your summer vacations, keep in mind that it’s not about you.  It’s about your wife (she’s your best friend, by the way), your children and family time.  Think ahead and make the choice to love.

Man up!