Ep.15 – How to Fight Lust

Dave discusses an article he recently read, suggesting that a person struggling with pornography should fight their anger – he disagrees. In this episode, he’ll give a better understanding of how to fight lust, or any other vice someone might struggle with. Dave also gives his parenting advice on the topic of teaching your kids expectations.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

The TrueManhood Podcast Episode 9 – Porn Addiction: Part 1

In this episode on pornography, part 1, Dave DiNuzzo opens up about his porn addiction, and a bit of how he overcame it, what porn is, why it’s bad, and how to help ourselves and our kids. Watch for part 2 coming soon, and watch for the upcoming episode on “The 5 Step Plan.” TrueMan up!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

The TrueManhood Podcast Episode 3 – The Devil’s Top 5 Lies

The TrueManhood Podcast, brought to you by TrueManhood Men’s Ministry, in Episode 3, will examine what we believe are the Devil’s Top 5 Lies to win souls. Lie #1: Pornography. #2: Decay of Marriage/Okay of Divorce. #3: Abortion/Contraception. #4: Gender Agenda. #5: Atheism/Secular Humanism

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Why Fight Porn?

So what’s the big deal with porn, anyway?  Why do we put so much emphasis on how evil and dangerous porn is?  Why fight porn?

Ask any Catholic priest and he’ll tell you that the majority (majority NOT used lightly here) of male confessions heard in the confessional are oriented towards impurity, lust, sexual misbehavior/acting out and pornography abuse.  This is also not to say that many of the female confessions heard in the confessional don’t also cover these topics.  Many priests I have asked about this topic have told me that upward of 85-90% of the confessions they hear from men are linked to pornography abuse.  This is astonishing and could be, if viewed incorrectly, disheartening.  The devil is attempting to kill our souls, our culture and our Church from the inside out through the use of pornography.  Many believe that it is not a public problem, that if “I” use porn in the quiet of my own home, that it doesn’t effect anyone else.  This is FALSE.

Tomorrow, I will dive into the reality of the effects of pornography, as well as the link pornography has to Life issues and social justice issues (such as divorce, rape, incest, abuse of women, domestic violence, etc.) and will attempt to create for you a strong correlation between these links.  The link between pornography (sexual hedonism and sexual utilitarianism) and many other serious issues is strong!

Before we go, I urge all men to educate themselves on the truth!  Don’t take my word for things, don’t take any one single person’s word for anything.  Do your research and go into it unbiased and open to the truth, for the truth shall set you free!  (This comes from a guy who doubted a ton, thought he could make his own truth and eventually got hit upside the proverbial head with the proverbial 2×4.  Take it from me… do your research!)

TrueMan up!

Porn Proves Deadly

As if our human reason wasn’t enough to tell us that pornography has deadly effects, here’s a story that surely will.

Picture this… An Ohio truck driver was barreling down the highway in upstate New York.  The driver, at this point sleep-deprived, is distracted.  “What is distracting him?” you ask.  The answer: Porn, being streamed on his laptop.  The driver’s rig hit a disabled car on a New York State highway.  The truck driver, a one Thomas Wallace, has been sentenced to three-to-nine years in prison for killing the driver, Julie Stratton, a 33-year-old mother of two.  Stratton’s vehicle was disabled because she had hit a deer and was waiting for assistance in the passing lane shoulder.

Wallace pleaded guilty in May to second-degree manslaughter. Authorities say he’d slept no more than four of the 27 hours before the Dec. 12, 2010 crash that killed Stratton.  The trucker tearfully apologized to the victim’s family at Wednesday’s sentencing.  Sorry bro, your apology isn’t enough.  Your apology doesn’t bring back a woman, a wife, a mother.

I was tempted to include a picture I came across that had “Fatal Accident” spelled out on top, with a graphic of an ambulance, the road and broken glass.  However, I didn’t.  This was no accident.  An accident is when a bird poops on our head, or when we bump into someone walking around a corner.  Wallace should have taken responsibility for his (extremely selfish) actions and disregard for humanity.  “You can stuff your sorrys in a sack, mister.”

Let’s get one thing straight here – pornography kills.  Sometimes figuratively, sometimes literally.  Most of the men, women and children that view pornography every day won’t end up being in a situation like Wallace, unfortunately, some might.  However, THEY ARE ALL in danger of killing their souls, their relationships, their ability to love, their ability to give, their ability to reason properly.  Pornography kills.

Aristotle once said:  “the angry man listens to reason, though not perfectly, but the lustful man does not listen to reason at all.”

TrueMan up!

Tuesdays with Daddy – “You Really Do Reap What You Sow”

Another installment of “Tuesdays with Daddy”.  For those who don’t know, I stay home with my two young daughters on Tuesdays and always have something important to blog about.

Today, I realized that we really do reap what we sow.  This morning, as I woke up with my two year old, I was amazed at how sweet she was.  She was saying things to me, like, “Daddy, may I please have some more cereal?” and “Daddy, I love you, VERY MUCH!” and “Daddy, you’re wonderful!”

Do you see where I’m going with this?  She’s repeating back to me phrases and statements (tone is important here, too) that I tell her often.  If I regularly talked to her in rough words, or words that aren’t loving, caring and sincere, she would talk to me that way too.  Eventually, she would probably speak to her teachers, coaches and friends in that same manner.  Instead, I choose to speak to her in the way I want her to speak to me and the rest of the world – lovingly.  (Be assured, I am firm when I need to be firm and scold when I need to scold.)

We really do reap what we sow.  And we’re constantly being watched.  With my girls, I’m being watched all the time.  As a follower of Christ, I simply cannot choose to abandon this responsibility.  I MUST work to exemplify Christ at all times.  I drop the ball quite often (as many of you know) but continue to get up and fight.  It’s a lot of responsibility, but if we expect to see change in our world for God, we must take this challenge on.

In your own life, I challenge you to figure out what you are sowing.  Are you sowing love?  Are you sowing anger, hatred, lust?  We really do reap what we sow.

Man up!

7 Days of Virtue; Day 4 – Temperance

Think of virtues like your muscles.  You work your muscles out so that they can perform for you when needed.  Virtue is the same way.  You practice, work on the virtue and then, when the time comes, the virtue is there and ready.

Day 4 of the 7 Day Journey through the Virtues: DAY 4 – TEMPERANCE.

Temperance moderates our attraction to pleasure.  This can be any form of pleasure… physical, emotional, sexual, mental, spiritual, etc.  There is an opposing vice that we should stay away from… insensibility (the complete rejection of any pleasure).  Pleasure, in and of itself, is not bad, as long as it is ordered and moderated.  There are three major vices that go along with temperance that we all deal with, in one way or another; it is NOT manly to indulge in these sins!

1. Gluttony – inordinate consumption of food and/or drink.  If they need a fork lift to come get you from the booth to your car, you ate too much.  We are incredibly guilty of this in America with our portion sizes.  A way to fight gluttony is by fasting.
2. Drunkenness – hinders our reason.  Drinking to excess means that we are willingly depriving ourselves of our reason (St. Thomas Aquinas).  A HUGE problem in our culture.  Men, drunkenness is not manly.  Being able to stop after 1 or 2 drinks is manly and it doesn’t just mean you do this when you are driving.  This is at home, at a party, with a DD, where ever.  Losing all ability to think, function, act and control yourself is cowardly.  Be a man, put the drink down.
3. Lust – is destructive and causes harm.  Sex, like fire, is a good thing  – in context.  If a fire gets out of control, it destroys.  If it is used how it is intended, it gives off warmth and can be used to cook.  Sex is the same way… if we make the choice to be chaste, we are ordering our sexuality in the way that God intended.  Don’t be fooled by society, lust is destructive.  Everyone’s NOT doing it – there are those of use who strive for it who are living chaste lives, even in our marriages.  St. Thomas Aquinas said: “A man who gives into his lust has weaknesses.  From this weakness means that he will give into his passions.  He is not free to love.”  Are you weak?  Be virtuous, control your sexuality, don’t let it control you.

Temperance guides us so that we do not fall into these sins.  Being temperate means that we know when enough is enough, too much or sinful.

Man up!