How Men Were Created To Pray
In response to a comment, stemming from a recent post: The question was asked, “How were men created to pray?” Please note, this post, as with all my posts, comes from my experiences and may or may not take into account every aspect of the topic. If you have additional thoughts, questions, doubts or replies, please write them in a comment below.
I believe that men were created to pray in a manner that is wild, unrelenting and strong. What do I mean by that? I mean that a man has to pray in the same way that he was created. It doesn’t make sense to do it any other way. We were created, as evidenced in the creation story in The Book of Genesis, to protect, defend and guide. (See Genesis chapter 2, specifically verse 15). Adam was instructed by God to do all these things as the man, the one who has dominion over the earth and the creatures of the land, air and sea. This was no small task. Adam was given a great amount of responsibility. Until the fall, Adam relied totally on God to direct and guide him. We should take this as a guide – that in all things, we should ask God to direct and guide us. After the fall, Adam was distanced from God and he toiled in the fields. This is where we find ourselves today. We toil, in whatever profession we have, and specifically, we toil in a real way when it comes to our conversations with God. Why is this?
The Catechism of the Catholic Church, in paragraph 397, explains this clearly. It says, “Man, tempted by the devil, let his trust in his Creator die in his heart and, abusing his freedom, disobeyed God’s command.” We do this daily! No wonder it’s so hard to pray!
If we know that we must trust God and that we must have reckless abandonment to God’s commands, then it will help us to pray. If we know that we were created to protect, defend and guide others, it will help us to pray. Now, some practicals:
- Find what works for you. We’re all different and there are many different ways to pray. Whatever your preference, do it often!
- Remember that prayer is a relationship with God. It takes two; God always does His part. Are you doing yours?
- Make your life a prayer. Every chance you get, talk/listen to God. (Guess what, you’ve got lots of chances to do this during your day!)
- A Man was created with a wildness within his heart – live wildly for God. Your prayer can be wild, rugged and intense.
- Do it often. Did I mention this already?
- Prayer is NOT an emotional thing; emotions may come about during/after prayer, but prayer itself is not emotional. Our prayer is based on our faith – if our faith is founded on the Truth, then it is stable and unchanging and our prayer must follow that model. If our faith isn’t founded on the Truth, then our faith (belief in God and His dominion over us) can change as quickly as the wind.
- Use helpful “tricks” to guide your prayer. One easy one is ACTS – Adoration Contrition Thanksgiving Supplication. Adoration is praising God, adoring Him, fervent worship of Him and His glory. Contrition is asking for forgiveness for our sins; NOT in place of Confession! Thanksgiving is thanking God for the blessings in our lives. Supplication is asking God for the things that we need in life.
I suggest that you read up on men of the Bible, as well as Catholic saints, to get more ideas on how men pray. Find one of these men that you share similarities with and try to emulate him and his style of prayer. These men came before us and succeeded (and sometimes failed) in order to pave the way for us.
Man up!
Encouraging Men to Get Involved
I recently posted “A Fireside Discussion” and received a comment requesting follow-up information about how to encourage men to get involved in the Church. Here you go…
Men won’t get involved in stuff if they don’t see a value. Also, they aren’t likely to attend an event, group or club unless they know someone else, and know them well. (These are all generalizations; please keep this in mind.) Another reason men won’t get involved is if they see the stuff as weak, lame or feminine. Unfortunately, many men see Mass, Church events, groups and retreats through this lens. From my previous post, I mentioned that the Church is “by women, for women”, and this is a big reason why men aren’t involved. Men shouldn’t be forced into praying like women pray, it doesn’t work for us. Men need to pray the way men were created to pray. There’s a difference, and that difference is important. (Maybe more on this in a future post?)
So how do you encourage men to participate? It’s tough to know, exactly. I think that a great way is to get to the heart of a man, that which God put deep inside each man. It’s different from anything else in the world, and hard to explain. See, men want to be rugged and tough. They want to shoot stuff, and fix stuff, and build stuff. They want to protect and defend, they want to love and be loved. They want to feel a purpose and be accomplished. Unfortunately, so many men don’t know how to do any of that stuff. If we want men to participate, we have to encourage them, build them up and GIVE THEM A PERSONAL INVITATION. Personal invitations, from men they trust and respect, might just be the thing to get a man involved at Church. The event better not suck, or be lame, and it better not be associated with ‘sissiness’. If it does, he’ll never come back.
I encourage all the faithful, if they know a man who needs to be involved, to be like St Monica. St Monica, the mother of St Augustine, prayed unceasingly for her son. Augustine was a wandering-soul. He lived a life of incredible sin and his mother still prayed. He became on of the greatest writers of the Church. That man who you know might just be the next St Augustine.
Man up!
What Does it Mean to Be Manly?
I came across a few videos today on YouTube that were a bit frustrating to watch. I’m not posting them here because 1. they are frustrating 2. they are inappropriate for my site and 3. I don’t want to promote the males that made these videos. What I found in these videos was a misconstrued image of manliness, but not in the normal sense (aka – “cultural manliness”, as I refer to it –> money, power, women, stuff…) but in a sense of bashing overly manly activities, ideas, thoughts and practices. Taking it to the other extreme; calling men to be more feminine. Yuck.
Let me make it clear to the readers of this blog what I mean when I say words like MANLY, MANLINESS, TRUEMAN, TRUEMANHOOD, etc. In essence, I mean virtue. In none of the three videos that sparked this post did they ever mention anything about virtue. It might get old hearing about virtue, and yes, I write about it frequently, but virtue = manliness. TrueManliness. Plain and simple.
Others can blog/vlog about whatever they want, but when it comes to talking about manliness, they aren’t my compass. My compass points are Christ and St. Joseph, combined with other saints and men who are alive (both literally and figuratively) in the faith. These men live(d) out “the greatest of these” – Love. Prudence, Temperance, Justice, Fortitude, Faith, Hope and Love. Live them.
If you would like a copy of some virtue materials, contact TrueManhood.com at proveritasspeakers@gmail.com.
Man up!
Celebrity Apprentice – Season 2
Are you familiar with Donald Trump? The multi-billionaire business man that created the show “The Apprentice”. Although he’s very good at what he does in business, he’s not the example of TrueManhood. He’s at it again, this time season two of Celebrity Apprentice. This show has been getting some big press and, as in years past, gains traction throughout the season. Season two started last night, although I didn’t watch it, I found this commercial clip for it. Watch…
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90zttzBDhZs]
I can’t begin to count the bad examples of manhood throughout the show… I can’t even keep up with them in this short one minute promo. Clint Black is “ready to go the wild side”, Pierce Morgan (altough he proclaims to be a Catholic-family man) is a crude, rude, pompous, arrogant man. Don’t even get me started on Rodman or Andrew Dice Clay. Tom Green is “stabbing people in the back”, and wearing wedding dresses on the street corner. We hear Trump say, as he flies around in his private helicopter, “It’s all about fighting for what you believe in.” I’m not sure what any of these celebrities believe in.
The show isn’t horrible, overall, as most of the money that is raised goes to (mostly) worthy charities. So, there’s at least one good part to it. It’s not at all what TrueManhood is about. If you can stomach it, watch an episode on nbc.com and see what you think. Are any of these men setting an example of TrueManhood or are they fulfilling society’s idea of “cultural manliness”? You decide.
Man up!
Manliness in the Modern Church
Saturday morning, I spoke at a local Men’s Breakfast. The room was full. The breakfast was hot (and tasty). It was good to see Catholic men coming together to join in brotherhood and to be inspired by a message. The ages ranged from a young teen boy all the way to some wise-men in their 80’s. 95% of the men in the room were fathers. I spoke about “Manliness in the Modern Church”.
The reality of it all is that our Church in America has been overrun by the feminist movement of the 1960’s. The sexual revolution “revolutionized” the decay of gender roles… and in the Church, it spread like wild fire. Manly women and feminine men (<– oxymorons, I know). What we see now is a Church where men are overly passive (if they go at all) and the brunt of the work is accomplished because of women. It sets a terrible example for our families; the children within the Church don’t understand what a man is. The boys go astray because they have no idea what it means to be a man and the girls follow after them… that’s what society tells them is normal and good.
The purpose of my talk was NOT AT ALL to bash women or to say that women shouldn’t do anything in the Church… on the contrary. [Without women in the Church who saw a wide-open-gap that needed filled, our Church would be in a much worse position than it already is.] The purpose was to call men to be men, to light a fire in their souls to live VIRTUOUS lives! To step up and LEAD! To FIGHT and DEFEND the Church, her people (women and children especially) and their own spirituality! Christ didn’t ask the apostles to sit around and wait for people to ask them what they believed. He commissioned them to action – “Come and Follow Me” – “Be fishers of men”.
The talk was well received and I think that it inspired these men to go forth and live out a virtuous, manly life. TrueManhood!
Man up!
Following an Example
I have a person in my life that exemplifies something that I strive for. This person, by their actions, calls me to something better than what I produce, in a way that isn’t judgmental, harsh or overtly obvious. This person simply acts in a way that entices me to perform in a better way. This person is my wife, Catherine. What she does is she lives a life that is selfless and always life-giving. When it comes to the kids, the house, work or family time, she always puts the needs of the rest of us first. And she does it in the smallest things. For instance, when she shops for groceries, she always buys what I like over what she likes. When we’re going out as a family, she always gets the girls ready, their bag ready, their toys ready… on and on. 
There’s an important lesson here –> Men can, and should, learn from women. Women typically show us a different perspective, a different point of view, a different emotion, a different thought process and usually a different plan. Notice that I said different… not better, not worse, simply different. This different perspective can (like in the situation above) guide us towards stronger manliness, if we choose to respond. Choosing to respond to a higher calling, to be a better man, is a major piece in achieving True Manhood. Many men think that manliness comes from the denial of the female perspective, however, I know differently. If I held that position, I would be the opposite of my wife… I would be forever selfish and consumed with my own desires. Thanks for setting such a great example Babe.
