‘Sexy’ Pressure for Girls at Halloween – an Article Primarily for Dads

The concept of ‘sexy pressure’ for girls at Halloween had never crossed my mind before my wife sent me a NY Times “parent blog” article – here it is – but now it’s resonating with me.  Makes me think about 10 years from now… what’s life going to be like for our little ones?  (Please read the article so that you understand what I’m talking about.  And not, I certainly don’t prescribe to what the author of the article is saying, but simply bringing it up as a point of discussion.)  I’m a father of 3 daughters, and although they are young, I’m aware of the pending pressure that’s coming – but apparently not aware enough.

In the article, you can sense that the pressure on girls comes mostly from other girls.  They didn’t talk about whether or not the guys thought they were ‘too sexy’, but the pressure stemmed almost exclusively from what the other girls perceived.  (I assert, too, that the pressure they feel isn’t so much real as it is only a perception, and the one quote shows that, when she says, essentially, “it’s not discussed but everyone knows it.”)  I’ve always found this to be true; the guys aren’t aware enough, most of the time, or don’t care enough, to make a big deal out of girl’s clothing.  Although there is that aspect when a girl is dressed in a “slutty” manner (per the article) when guys notice and begin to pay attention to her.  This is age-old.

What’s the big deal here?  Isn’t this just adolescent development, trial-and-error, and growing pains?  No, I don’t think so.  It’s a big deal because of the culture around our kids.  They see particular things online, on TV, in movies, in music videos, etc. and whatever is “it” MUST be emulated.  At least in their minds.  Whatever’s hip, cool, newest, biggest, baddest, and those things that push the moral lines, is what is desired.  Again, this is age-old.  The shiny thing that grabs attention is what becomes so sought after.  So, with our young women, and this idea of “dressing sexy for Halloween”, what do we do?  Fathers… where are you?

Here’s what we do.  I’ve written about this before, I speak about this all the time, I teach my kids in class this concept in all we do.  It’s not a new concept… it too is age-old.  We teach our kids that they are intrinsically good and that God loves them, and that we love them.  We instill in them a self-worth that is so strong that it can stand up against any cultural phenomenon, any peer pressure, any moral dilemma and come out victorious.  Without this self-worth, without this knowledge that they have a dignity that is deserving of only the greatest, they will fall into the pressure of the world to find their happiness, self-worth, and coolness factor from other things.  In the end, those other things won’t bring happiness, only emptiness.

Fathers: if you’re not the most loving, caring, compassionate, uplifting source of goodness in your daughter’s life, then why not?!  She needs your attention, your affection, your love, your discipline, your care, your concern.  NEEDS it like she needs water, food, oxygen, and shelter.  An absolute necessity.  If you’ve failed her in this area up to this point, work to fix your mistakes.  You’ve got 10 days before Halloween, it’s not too late.  And let’s be real, Halloween isn’t the issue, but it certainly accentuates the issue.

TrueMan up!

Book Dave to Speak

Dave DiNuzzo Sr. is currently booking dates to speak at conferences, parishes, college campuses, and retreats.  He has been speaking to crowds of all different sizes and kinds, spreading the message of Jesus Christ, since he was a teenager.  As a Catholic husband and father of 4, Dave utilizes his experiences as a speaker, Theology teacher, Author, Blogger, Podcaster, Radio host, and retreat master to bring audiences along through catechetical topics while infusing stories, inspiration, and real life into his talks.  He wants to invigorate your group in a deep and authentic way.  Contact him today!

To book Dave to speak at your event, email ContactUs@TrueManhood.com.

Spiritual Help for our Heroes – Frontline Faith Project

Recently, I came across an awesome apostolate called Frontline Faith.  Visit them HERE.  In short, what they do is supply our service men and women, serving in deployed locations, with Catholic content on mp3 players.

“The FRONTLINE FAITH™ Project delivers MP3 players preloaded with spiritual content, especially as it pertains to military service, to members of our armed forces currently deployed or returning from deployment, with special emphasis on injured troops and troops stationed in Iraq or Afghanistan.”

What will you do for the soul of one soldier?  Please support Frontline Faith and their work by donating $24 (or more).  To donate, click HERE.  It takes people with vision to serve those in need.  Our deployed soldiers, as well as those who have been or are going to be deployed, need our prayers, support and acts of kindness.  They sacrifice their well-being, their comfort, their families, their children, their spouse and sometimes their lives so that we can be free.  To our service men and women of all of the branches of the military, thank you!

Home of the free, because of the brave.

Cheri, Sheila and the rest of the team at Frontline Faith… keep up the great work!

TrueMan up!

True Devotion to Jesus, Through Mary

Today is the feast day of St. Louis de Montfort.  St. Louis lived in the 17th and 18th centuries and his greatest contribution to the faith was that of perseverance in the face of critique and encouragement of the Church to be devoted to Jesus through Mary.  For many, this Catholic teaching is hard because they may see devotion to Mary as an unnecessary practice, and in some cases, as blasphemous.  Others may see devotion to Mary as something less-than-manly.  On the contrary!  Devotion to Mary, which St. Louis stressed in both writings, words and deeds, is the way to grow incredibly close to her son, our Lord, Jesus.  As men, we have a great deal to learn about obedience and can learn a lot from Mary’s example.

First, the Maryology… there’s too much that would go into giving a dissertation on Mary here, however, I will draw attention to her place in salvation history.  Mary accepted God’s will in her life and enthusiastically followed.  Through her ‘yes’, Christ came into the world.  Christ means King, and Mary therefore is the Queen Mother.  The Queen Mother sits with the King petitioning for His loyal servants. (1 Kings 1:19.)  By her ‘yes’, we reap the benefits of our Saviour.

St. Louis shows us that the theological virtues are the way to TrueManhood.  He set a great example for us to achieve the virtues of faith, hope and love.  The world attempts to tell men that these virtues are feminine and unnecessary.  Take a look at just about any piece of media and you will see a direct attack against these virtues.  St. Louis demonstrated great courage in the face of opposition and persecution to strive for faith, hope and love.

Lastly, a brief word of encouragement in regards to the Rosary.  Faithful Catholics don’t just ‘say’ the Rosary, we ‘pray’ the Rosary.  The Rosary is a mixture of reciting communal prayers (Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, etc.) AND a deep meditation (simultaneously, mind you) of the mysteries of the Rosary.  The mysteries point directly to Christ’s life and ministry, culminating in His saving work of dying on the cross for our sins – the greatest example of manliness we have!  Pray on!

The Rosary is our sword in the battle of Good vs. Evil.

TrueMan up!

The Holy Father’s Week

This week marked Pope Benedict XVI’s 83rd birthday.  Happy Birthday to him, and may he have many more!  Recently, in the news, the Holy Father has been under siege by the secular media.  I’ve been debating with myself whether or not to join the discussion, and have decided to say only a few words.

First, Pope Benedict XVI is the successor of St. Peter and with that comes both a great deal of responsibility and [should also come with] a great deal of respect.  Secondly, the media has been everything but respectful, and honestly, they have been downright scandalous in regards to their comments, attacks and accusations.  (I expect nothing less from the media; they are anti-Catholic and despicable.)  Thirdly, Pope Benedict has not, nor does he, nor will he, condone abuse of children, whether it comes in the form of pedophilia, ephebophilia, homosexual acts by priests or other.  He has never, nor will ever, cover up sex-abuse scandal and simply does not operate that way.  The secular media paints a picture of Pope Benedict as the responsible party in the sex-abuse cases over the past 50+ years, and simply put, PB16 does not deserve to be treated this way.

If the faithful take time to realize what’s going on, each of us will see that the salacious claims against PB16 are another ploy by the culture to discredit, undermine and attempt to destroy the Catholic Church.  Pope Benedict is a great shepherd and is leading the Church well.

Knights of Columbus, and others, all around the world have united to pray for protection, strength and clarity for Pope Benedict XVI.  I recommend you join the cause.

TrueMan up!

The Power to Positively Effect Change

I don’t typically follow mainstream media, news or happenings, and I definitely don’t follow the NBA, so this story was interesting to me when I heard about it.  Recently, in an interview with Maxim Magazine, LeBron James (Team Captain of the Cleveland Cavaliers) was quoted, when asked “If there was one guy on the planet you could dunk on, who would it be?”, as saying: “If it doesn’t have to be a basketball player, George W. Bush. I would dunk on his [ass], break the rim, and shatter the glass.”  (LeBron is a known-supporter of Barack Obama.)

The friend who told me about this LeBron story wrote this to me in our correspondence: “Boston just beat the Cavaliers with King James and Shaq. After LeBron’s majorly inappropriate comment about wanting to dunk and shatter the backboard over Pres. Bush (more than any other person), I have lost respect for LeBron. How about dunking over Osama Bin Laden? In LeBron’s role model position, you just don’t show that kind of disrespect for the President even if you don’t like him. Not to mention, his poor sportsmanship in losing the playoffs last year… he wouldn’t shake hands after the game. Your manly opinion on this?“

In response, I wrote: “In my humble opinion, LeBron has no class, no leadership and an immaturity that rivals others.  He who, in his position, could effect MAJOR POSITIVE CHANGE on a global level. On a manliness scale, he’d rank very very low. No virtue = Not Manly.”

The reason I highlighted positive change (both in my response to my friend and in the title of this post) is because LeBron could bring about so much positive change in this world, simply because of his stature, his following and his presence in the media.  The trouble here, is that if you ask a fan of LeBron if he’s effecting positive change in the world, they’ll emphatically say “Yes!”  It’s a clouded judgment that some people can’t see past because he appears to be so influential and such a boost for the sport.  A TRUE boost to the sport would be challenging men to live virtuous, moral lives.

Just my $.02 today.

Man up!