Why Fight Porn?

So what’s the big deal with porn, anyway?  Why do we put so much emphasis on how evil and dangerous porn is?  Why fight porn?

Ask any Catholic priest and he’ll tell you that the majority (majority NOT used lightly here) of male confessions heard in the confessional are oriented towards impurity, lust, sexual misbehavior/acting out and pornography abuse.  This is also not to say that many of the female confessions heard in the confessional don’t also cover these topics.  Many priests I have asked about this topic have told me that upward of 85-90% of the confessions they hear from men are linked to pornography abuse.  This is astonishing and could be, if viewed incorrectly, disheartening.  The devil is attempting to kill our souls, our culture and our Church from the inside out through the use of pornography.  Many believe that it is not a public problem, that if “I” use porn in the quiet of my own home, that it doesn’t effect anyone else.  This is FALSE.

Tomorrow, I will dive into the reality of the effects of pornography, as well as the link pornography has to Life issues and social justice issues (such as divorce, rape, incest, abuse of women, domestic violence, etc.) and will attempt to create for you a strong correlation between these links.  The link between pornography (sexual hedonism and sexual utilitarianism) and many other serious issues is strong!

Before we go, I urge all men to educate themselves on the truth!  Don’t take my word for things, don’t take any one single person’s word for anything.  Do your research and go into it unbiased and open to the truth, for the truth shall set you free!  (This comes from a guy who doubted a ton, thought he could make his own truth and eventually got hit upside the proverbial head with the proverbial 2×4.  Take it from me… do your research!)

TrueMan up!

Embracing Life

Still on vacation… had another experience I needed to blog about.  This story is a simple one, yet it contains an incredible life lesson.

Last night, we had a shuttle driver take us from the water park to our resort.  Stan showed up right on time, came around the vehicle to let us in and proceeded to very skillfully drive us through the night’s traffic.  We began in small talk, and eventually began talking about life.  Stan, a married man of many years, had moved to Florida some 15+ years ago with his wife.  Just over a year ago, they moved to Orlando to find work.  Stan had worked in construction, installing windows and doors, for many years.  After losing his job, he took it upon himself to find more work, any work.  With the Florida’s economic failings, building was way down and construction jobs weren’t available.  As he told us about the tough times that he and his wife experienced, we experienced a side of Stan that I wish everyone could experience.  Pure joy.

Stan exemplified joy.  He was happy, pleasant, energetic and sincere.  Stan spoke of the hardships of losing work in a way that told me that he knew that in order to live (to provide, to be a man) he needed to take whatever work came along.  Being a shuttle driver isn’t glamorous, powerful or high-paying – it’s long hours, sometimes unrulely patrons and small wages.  He was simply happy to have a job and knows that many others don’t.  He knows he is truly blessed.  Stan chose to look at his job as if the glass was not only half-full, but that it was overflowing.  Stan told us about grabbing as much over time as he could, about the full benefits that his company offers and about how he wakes up each morning wanting to go to work, simply glad to have a paycheck. 

The life lesson… live joy.  Joy is a powerful tool.  I’ve blogged about it before, but in a different context.  Stan’s story shows us that no matter what the world throws at us, we can live a happy life.  Stan knows that money and possessions are not what rules his life, but loving his wife and giving 100% at work is incredibly honorable and manly, and that dictates what he does in life.  Stan shows us all that a TrueMan does what he has to, when he has to, no matter what, in order to live and provide.

Stan… the skies are blue for you, my friend.  There will be great things for you in your future – stay positive, energetic and hardworking.  Your wife is a lucky woman – keep treating her as your queen.  Best of luck to you.  I’m a better man after meeting you.

Man up!

Security in Purity – A Message to Women

So many women in our society (especially young women) have a lack of self-worth and a deeply rooted insecurity in who they are.  They want to fit in, be accepted and ultimately, receive love.  This sometimes (more often than not these days) leads to dressing inappropriately and engaging in promiscuous sexual relationships — all in the name of finding love.  They think that in order for a man to think they’re attractive, to be excited by them and to love them, they must “put out”.  [After all, they are being fed lies from this menu everyday by society.]  The problem arises that this simply is not real, lasting love, and the feelings of insecurity and perpetual emptiness persist.  It pains me to see young women who think this way because they should be thinking the exact opposite… that they are an amazing and precious creation from God the Father and that they should never settle for anything less than the best.  A man is only worthy to be in their presence if he upholds their dignity and shows them the utmost respect.  Women deserve better than what they are typically given and owe it to themselves to require a True Man.

If you are a woman that struggles with self-worth and insecurity, please take my words to heart.  You are worth nothing less than the best.  You are worth being in a relationship with a man who loves you (real love), who adores you and who respects you.  You don’t have to have sex with him before marriage… if he really loves you, he’ll wait for you.  (If he’s a True Man and really loves you, he’ll want to wait for you because you’re that special!)  When it comes to the way you dress, you describe to men what you are seeking by the way you dress.  If you wear something revealing, it tells a man “I want to reveal myself to you”.  *Keep in mind the distinction between dressing attractively and dressing to attract.  If you want to draw in the right type of man, dress with respect and purity.  You’ll find real security, love and worth if you seek purity.  You are worth it.

For the women out there that are confident and content in who they are, continue to be an example to women everywhere and continue to set the standard high for what men should be striving for.  Never lower your standards.