Cultural Manliness – a Review

Back in 2011, I wrote this post to review “cultural manliness”.  I’m posting again because it’s important that people hear this term, understand this concept, and work to fight it.  I was recently at a large Catholic conference, and no matter who I talked to, they all agreed that cultural manliness is in fact rampant, and is in fact, a highly worth-while cause to fight.  I appreciate the support and ask that everyone work with me to explain this concept so that our men, young men, and our boys learn what it means to be authentically masculine, a TrueMan.

Cultural manliness, for those unfamiliar with the term (which I coined several years ago) is the idea that “the more power, money, sex and stuff a male has, the more manly he is.”  This idea is propagated in our culture virtually non-stop, whether on the television, on the internet, in movies, throughout magazines and newspapers, on billboards, in songs, in advertising and just about anywhere those areas don’t cover.  The idea is propagated for a few reasons: 1. men buy into this lie.  2. women buy into this lie.  3. children buy into this lie.  4. people make money off of this lie.  5. the devil wins souls through this lie.

Cultural manliness – being in pursuit of the things of this world – will kill a man.  Power, money, sex and stuff doesn’t win our salvation, but it certainly can keep us from it.  Cultural manliness easily gets in the way of a relationship with Christ.  Why does this matter?  Because Christ is the true example of manliness!  He is THE TrueMan.  He is the reason this site exists.  He is the reason why the site is called what it is called.  “Blessed be Jesus Christ, True God and TrueMan.”  Anything other than pursuing Christ is futile and unmanly.

The world wants to tell a man that he will be ‘happy’ if he has more power, more sex, more money and more stuff.  These things, in and of themselves are not bad, but they don’t bring happiness.  They may bring emotional counterfeits that men believe to be happiness, but they aren’t happiness.

What then makes a man, if it’s not power, money, sex and stuff?  Virtue!  Prudence, Justice, Fortitude and Temperance – Faith, Hope and Love.  Learn them, live them, be a TrueMan!  (Read the “TrueManhood Guide to Virtue” here.)

If you’d like to read more on the topic, do a search (in the white box on the upper right portion of each page of this site) for “cultural manliness”.  You’ll have plenty of reading material.  Or, go to the blog page and click the “cultural manliness” tab.  I’d like to know your thoughts on this topic – leave a comment.

TrueMan up!

A Review: Cultural Manliness

I haven’t written about cultural manliness in a while, so I thought I’d review it.  Cultural manliness, for those unfamiliar with the term (which I coined a few years ago) is the idea that “the more power, money, sex and stuff a male has, the more manly he is.”  This idea is propagated in our culture virtually non-stop, whether on the television, on the internet, in movies, throughout magazines and newspapers, on billboards, in songs, in advertising and just about anywhere those areas don’t cover.  The idea is propagated for a few reasons: 1. men buy into this lie.  2. women buy into this lie.  3. children buy into this lie.  4. people make money off of this lie.  5. the devil wins souls through this lie.

Cultural manliness – being in pursuit of the things of this world – will kill a man.  Power, money, sex and stuff doesn’t win our salvation, but it certainly can keep us from it.  Cultural manliness easily gets in the way of a relationship with Christ.  Why does this matter?  Because Christ is the true example of manliness!  He is THE TrueMan.  He is the reason this site exists.  He is the reason why the site is called what it is called.  “Blessed be Jesus Christ, True God and TrueMan.”  Anything other than pursuing Christ is futile and unmanly.

The world wants to tell a man that he will be ‘happy’ if he has more power, more sex, more money and more stuff.  This things, in and of themselves are not bad, but they don’t bring happiness.  They may bring emotional counterfeits that men believe to be happiness, but they aren’t happiness.

What then makes a man, if it’s not power, money, sex and stuff?  Virtue!  Prudence, Justice, Fortitude and Temperance – Faith, Hope and Love.  Learn them, live them, be a TrueMan!  (Read the “TrueManhood Guide to Virtue” here.)

If you’d like to read more on the topic, do a search (in the white box on the upper right portion of each page of this site) for “cultural manliness”.  You’ll have plenty of reading material.  Or, go to the blog page and click the “cultural manliness” tab.  I’d like to know your thoughts on this topic – leave a comment.

TrueMan up!

Fighting Cultural Manliness

Society makes suggestions to us, either directly or indirectly, about what’s manly and what’s not.  Typically, society paints a picture that “cultural manliness” stems from all or part of the following: POWER, MONEY, SEX and STUFF.  Society calls a man who possesses these things a “real man”.  Separately, and in the right context, these attributes are wonderful, and add nicely to life.  When used out of context, they can become disastrous.  If a male possesses one (or more) of these attributes, than he automatically racks up points on an invisible ‘man scale’.  A given amount of points on the cultural manliness scale doesn’t necessarily gain a guy anything, and it’s not like he can cash those points in for anything tangible.  Nor is this something that guys sit around and discuss, it just sort of “is”.  It comes from movies and music, tv and the internet.  It’s the machismo mindset.  However, because of the picture that is painted, a man with lots of points is (for whatever reason) elevated to a higher level than a regular Joe.  As this happens, men being elevated and esteemed for what they possess and/or what they have done, other men desire to emulate these “real men” and therefore, “get what he has and do what he’s done.”  Other men begin to shoot for power, money, sex and stuff, instead of what really determines what manliness is.

What is real manliness???  Or, in our case, TrueManhood??? If real manliness isn’t power, money, sex and stuff, what is it?  Where can we find out?  What can we do to become really manly?  Well, we’re given lots of great examples throughout history of what NOT to do and what’s NOT really manly.  Where do we go to find good examples?  I’d like to point to a few perfect examples of what manliness is using three Biblical characters.

1. After a storied youth, this man fell away from God and screwed up royally.  He engaged in sins of the flesh which led to men dying and problems for others around him.  However, instead of remaining lazy and indifferent, he heeded the words of his dear friend and decided to better himself and devoted his life to serving, honoring and praising God.  He became faithful, prayerful and humble.  He set an example of great virtue for others to see.  He, like us, sinned – but repented, asking for forgiveness and continue to grow in holiness.

2. This man was wronged at an early age.  After spending many years in confinement for crimes he hadn’t committed, he rose in the ranks and eventually became the king’s trusted advisor.  Instead of taking vengeance on the men who wronged him, he chose love, honor and service.  This man was a humble and faithful servant to God, never losing his foundation of prayer, trust and faith.  An incredible witness of how to work through hardships.

3. This man was given, quite possibly, the hardest task a human father could be given.  He was asked to take on a role that no other father had ever been asked to do, but he readily accepted and because he was a virtuous man, he succeeded in this difficult task.  Because he trusted God (and His messenger), this man remained faithful and obedient.  Due to his successful job-well-done, all men have a perfect example of what it means to be a chaste husband, a loving father and a hard worker.

What is TrueManhood?  From these three examples, we see a theme: these three men were virtuous.  Their virtue (especially their theological virtue of faith) allowed them to persevere and to continue to serve God.

The idea of cultural manliness is that, as you accumulate more wealth, as you sleep with more women, as you buy more stuff and as your power “ranking” goes up, the more manly you are.  Cultural manliness never takes into account your virtue, your faith, your relationship with God and/or others, how you treat your wife, children, family, friends, strangers, etc.  Cultural manliness is a facade, a lie, a demeaning and empty way of living.  The glamour of being a “culturally manly” man will wear off in time.  How many people will a culturally manly man hurt along the way?

I call this cultural manliness for a reason, a simple reason.  The culture is expressing the thought that everyone, man or woman, is in this world on their own, free to make up their own truth, free to generate their own spirituality from within.  A man simply goes after what he wants, and his list of wants comes from what gives him pleasure.  Seeking pleasure is what drives his actions and pleasure is often the only motive behind actions.

The Biblical characters described above are, in order: King David, Joseph of the Old Testament and St. Joseph, Patron Saint of Fathers and Workers.

Examples Are All Around

There are examples of what not to do all around us.  The idea of cultural manliness (this ideology that the more money, power, sex and stuff I have, the more manly I’ll be) is completely absurd.  This idea is rampant, yet many times, we’re so desensitized to its ugly face, that we hardly even notice it.  I noticed it today…  I snagged this post from Facebook today.  It’s quite simple, and best explained directly from the picture.  Please note, my red circular marks direct your attention to the parts that are most important, and quite honestly, most appalling.

I’m not sure if this guy just wants to fit in or what, but his comment is ridiculous and the words written in the description are horrible too.  See for yourself.

Man up!