5 Myths About Masturbation by Brian Kissinger (thePornEffect.com)

Masturbation is a topic that is rarely discussed.  It should be discussed more, and more openly, and not just with teen boys with raging hormones.  I’ve been speaking about pornography use a lot lately on my radio program, in talks I’ve been giving, and as it comes up in conversation with people and even I fail to discuss this side of the topic.  It’s a serious sin (mortal) and almost always linked to pornography use or disordered fantasy.  Clinicians sometimes refer to masturbation as “self-harm”, “self-abuse”, “self-use”, etc.  Planned Parenthood, and their materials, encourage masturbation for children starting at a very young age.  Let’s expose the lies and bring it into the light.

I saw this article posted on The Porn Effect and thought it was important to share.  The author is Brian Kissinger.

“I have read a few books, I have even taken courses on the subject, but nothing could have fully prepared me for teaching a year-long class of Theology of the Body to 150 freshman boys.  Words can’t quite describe the awkwardness of a room full of 14-year-olds trying to maturely discuss the mechanics of the male reproductive system.  One day, as class was ending, one of the students asked me a question that I thought had to be a joke. He wanted to know i it was true that people will explode if they don’t masturbate regularly.  It took me a little while to realize that he was being completely serious, and it was then that I realized just how confused our world has become.

Here are five lies about masturbation that I believe have infected our culture: 

Myth #1: Only Boys Struggle With it

Even though boys are usually the ones joking about masturbation, the truth is that this is an issue for many women as well. Like other issues of sexuality, this subject of jokes for boys is often a source of shame for the girls who struggle.  Even in youth ministry, chastity talks for boys often include mention of masturbation while the topic isn’t, unfortunately, addressed as frequently with girls.

Myth #2: It Can’t Be A Sin; It’s “Natural”

The existence of something in nature is never a good argument for moral issues. I’ve heard people bring up this argument after discovering that certain animals have been known to masturbate.  Anyone who’s been outside can tell you that animals do a lot of weird stuff. I’ve seen dogs eat their vomit and monkeys play with their crap, but neither of these “natural” examples should inspire imitation.

Myth #3: It Doesn’t Hurt Anyone

Everything we do in life is training, either toward virtue or vice. Every athlete, musician, actors, and cage fighter can tell you that practice matters. Masturbation trains us to think that sexual desire is something that should be satisfied immediately, and it reinforces the idea that sex is about selfish instant gratification.  While love is all about giving and sacrificing one’s desires for the needs of another person, masturbation is all about training us to do whatever we want to feel good. Masturbation slowly but surely destroys our ability to give and receive love.  

Myth #4: It’s Just A Way To Release Sexual Tension

Did you see that news story about the teen who spontaneously combusted because of pent-up sexual tension? Yeah, me neither. According to this logical, the people who masturbate the most should be the most peaceful and sexually pure people around.  That’s like telling someone with anger management issues that fist fights are a good way to relieve the tension. A momentary sense of relief is not worth the guilt, shame, and loneliness that are tied to the sin.

Myth #5: It’s Just A Phase You’re Going Through 

Like all sins, masturbation doesn’t just go away over time. In fact the opposite is true: the more we do it, the more we become attached to the habit It’s not a problem that magically disappears when you get married.  So many marriages have been ruined by a spouse’s addiction to masturbation. When a husband or wife turns to themselves for sexual gratification, the other spouse will naturally feel like they’re inadequate.  Regardless of your past, your habits, or your lack of will power, there is hope.  God’s not cheering for you rom a distance; He’s living in you to bring power where you are weak. Run to the Sacrament of Reconciliation and you will find both healing and freedom.” 

Stop Saying “Boys will be Boys”

I’m flabbergasted that the following stories (links provided below) are happening, but then I remind myself that parents just haven’t been parenting.  The only way this sort of stuff goes on is when – 1.) Kids are poorly formed.  2.) Kids are unsupervised. (This includes their unsupervised cell phones, emails, facebooks and all other forms of technology.)  3.) The poorly formed kids influence the other kids.  4.) Older siblings influence younger.  5.) No one pays attention to what’s happening in the ‘personal’ lives of kids.

Here’s the article from NY Times writer Maureen Dowd… CLICK HERE.

Here’s a Catholic follow up to it from US Catholic.org… CLICK HERE.

Come on parents, get involved in your kid’s lives.  Spend some time with them.  Know what they are doing.  Get excited about what your kid is excited about (as long as it’s positive!).  Invest in them and this sort of crap will stop.  To the men… if you’re a father, or hope to be one day, you MUST take an active role in your children’s lives.  If you don’t know what that means, but want to work on it, then email us at Info@TrueManhood.com.  Do it today.

TrueMan up!