Don’t Write Him Off

I’m certainly guilty of it.  I imagine most of you are, too.  We see a person, and make a snap judgment.  “They must be _________.” (fill in the blank.)  It doesn’t matter what the snap judgment is, it matters because we just made it.  We broke one of the cardinal-cliché-rules… we judged a book by its cover.  Sure, sometimes our assumptions are correct.  Other times, maybe most of the time, we are dead wrong.  In the evangelization world, being dead wrong can cost people their souls.

 Back in the day, I’m certain that people judged my cover properly… there wasn’t much of a secret that I was the least likely candidate for anyone to invest in, but thankfully, they went beyond my cover and saw the potential on the inside.  My “book cover” screamed of anti-Catholic sentiment, with a splash of rage, a hefty dose of pride, a heaping handful of aggression, an overflowing cup of womanizing, and a host of other horrible traits.  And that was just what was on the surface that people could see!  I was pretty far gone, yet people saw enough hope in the risen Lord that He could get to me, and He did.  I am forever grateful to the people who didn’t give up on me, and want to urge you to remember that you can’t simply write a man off because he appears a certain way, or even acts a certain way.

Who might I be talking about?  Men who are overly rich, men who are overly poor.  Men who are into heavy rock, or into gangster rap.  It might be men who spend copious amounts of time in the gym, or at the firing range, or in the garage, or at the clubs.  How about men who use four letter words every third word?  It might be men who’ve never graced the doors of a church, or the man sitting in the pew behind you in Mass every week.  Men with kids, men without.  Men who smoke, men who drink.  Men with tattoos, men with scars.  Men who wear boots, men who carry guns.  Men who drive sports cars, or jacked up trucks, or an old jalopy.  My point… it doesn’t matter – each man has the same calling to TrueManhood.

 As with everything, we should look to Christ.  Who did He invest in?  Jesus spent time, and befriended, some of the worst dudes around.  He knew what He was doing, and look what those men did!  Take the various fishermen, or the tax-collector, or even the worst persecutor of Christians of the time.  Jesus went after them, conquered their hearts, and commissioned them to go out and make disciples of all nations.  These ruffians, thugs, scallywags, and barbarians became the greatest evangelists of all time.  Thank the Lord that He didn’t write them off!

 So here’s an action-challenge: assess your scope of influence, determining the men in that scope, whether family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, strangers, etc. and make a list of any/all men that you’ve written off.  By writing them off, you’ve missed opportunities to talk to them, to learn about them (or learn from them), to ask them questions, to give them the benefit of the doubt, etc.  By writing them off, you’ve also destroyed the opportunity to serve them, love them, and to call them to something higher in life.  Take this list – whether it be 1 man or 20 – and begin to pray for each man by name.  In your prayer, ask God to guide your interactions (especially the next one) and to give you the strength to say or do what is right.  You may be the only opportunity that man has to learn about Jesus Christ, the TrueMan.  And you never know, he may be the next great evangelist that the world needs.

 When my college friends chose not to write me off, it allowed a seed to blossom into many fruitful things.  Had they written me off, and not seen the potential in me, only God knows where I would have been.  I’m sure it wouldn’t be good, and I’m sure that many of the bad decisions I was making would have been amplified and continued.  Thankfully, my conversion towards Christ changed me, brought me back into His Universal Church, led me to my wife and our four beautiful children.  Thankfully, my conversion led to these years of service in ministry – hopefully doing the greatest good, of loving people and telling the Good News – and especially this ministry, TrueManhood Men’s Ministry.

 Regardless of what a man is “in to”, he is called to holiness, to union with God.  God the Father desires to have a relationship with His son.  It may take you or me to introduce the son to his Father.  Don’t shy away from the opportunities to reach out to even the least likely candidates.

 TrueMan up!

Example to the Example – St. Joseph

Happy Feast of St. Joseph!  As you’ll hear in this vlog (below), St. Joseph is my favorite saint.  He is such an incredible example to us, and for me personally, has played a huge role in me growing into the man I am today.  St. Joseph is so complex, and has so many dimensions, it is hard to decide what to discuss!

I titled this post “example to the example” because it forces us to look a level or two deeper than we normally look.  St. Joseph is not merely a saint.  Not merely Mary’s husband.  Not merely the most chaste spouse.  St. Joseph is the example by which Jesus – the perfect example of masculinity –  learned to be a man.  Whoa!  What a huge role that was.

St. Joseph – I ask you to intercede for me.  Take my needs to your son, The King, and beg Him, on my behalf, for the grace necessary to be the man, the husband, and the father He is calling me to be.  Thank you for your example to me, and the daily reminder you give me through my wife and children.

TrueMan up!

Here’s an old video that I was asked to help with, back in 2011, to help promote the movie “Courageous”.  In this video, I speak about being a chaste spouse.  [This project was a St. Joseph Novena – a video a day, leading up to Father’s Day.]  (Disregard dates, my title, etc. – the information is outdated.)

Back at It… Finally!

The day has come.  The time is now.  After a few years of dormancy, and many headaches in dealing the ramifications of our site being hacked back in 2011, and the countless and continued issues through 2012/13, TrueManhood.com is back up and running!  We are thrilled!  The first real blog post will come tomorrow.

I chose Ash Wednesday 2014 because I thought it was fitting.  In the attempt to help aid men in their journey towards TrueManhood (aka “authentic masculinity”), what better time than now to unite our lives to Jesus Christ?  That’s what Lent is all about.  As the perfect example of TrueManhood, we know that Jesus provides the model by which to live.

We’re going to work to bring solid content, and focus on an area that we know needs some serious attention… “cultural manliness^©“.  Essentially… “What does it mean for a male to be a man?”  For those reading who might not know this term, cultural manliness is the idea of masculinity that the world is selling to males.  It tells us that “the more power, money, sex, and stuff a man consumes, the more manly he is.”  As I’ve written time and again, this is a lie!  Masculinity is all about virtue, not about consuming things and people.

We welcome all men to journey with us towards TrueManhood.  However, be aware… TrueManhood is counter-cultural, radical, and about persevering in these areas.  It is not easy.  It is not always fun.  It is not the way of the world.  Get your gear on, make preparations, and come along in the battle.

TrueMan up!