Tweet-Talk… Porn’s No Good, Ochocinco

I don’t tweet.  I have a Twitter account, and my Facebook page updates are automatically put on Twitter, but as for following, tweeting, re-tweeting, etc… I haven’t gotten into it.  I can see, however, from the post below, that Twitter can actually bring about some good.  Here’s a status from yesterday’s (2/8/12) #4 most mentioned person, my friend, John Leyendecker.

THROWING STONES AT OCHO’S PORNOGRAPHY – read below or view on the FOCUS Equip website.

So yesterday Chad Ochocinco (his Twitter handle is: @ochocinco) responded to me (@johnleyendecker) on Twitter! Can you believe it? I mean, c’mon, the guy has 3.2 million followers and he responded to me! This was huge! My kids have his Bengals jerseys (sorry Patriots fans) both with Johnson and Ochocinco on the back. My 4 year old son’s nickname is Sojo, which he immediately turned into Sojo-Cinco. Needless to say, we are HUGE fans.

What was said was troubling, but not surprising.

Here is the thread:

It all started when a Twitter follower of Chad Ochocinco’s asked him about a pornography website.

Ochocinco responds:

@ochocinco A very interesting site, I get most of my creative ideas from there to keep HER guessing what’s next.

In response to this tweet, I tweeted:

@johnleyendecker: @ochocinco you claim to be Christian, yet look at porn? You are a joke. Be a man. Honor your God and women. Kids look up to you.

This is when Ochocinco responds directly to my tweet:

@ochocinco: I tend to back slide every now and then kind sir. RT@johnleyendecker: @ochocinco you claim to be Christian, yet look at porn?

@johnleyendecker: just hope that people realize you are backsliding, not glorifying it. Peace & grace to you!

@ochocinco: I love you to oh Holy One RT @johnleyendecker: just hope that people realize you are backsliding, not glorifying it. Peace & grace to you!

From this interaction, almost 300 people on Twitter replied to our conversation. Some defended him and some encouraged me…but they mostly defended him.

Twitter only allows 140 characters, so I wanted to tell Chad and others what I really meant:

First, I want to apologize because in my zeal I left out a key phrase that would have given better context. I meant to say “you claim to be a Christian, yet you are glorifying looking at pornography.” So for this, I ask your forgiveness.

But the rest, I have to admit, I meant. Men who look at pornography and have no remorse, regret, or even go so far as to make it seem creative as you did Chad are a joke. Not joke, funny, but as in a joke not to be taken seriously.

I appreciate your comment about backsliding. I know a lot about backsliding. I know a lot about my own brokenness being what Christ is using in me to heal others. I know very well St. Paul’s words, “I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” (Romans 7:15) I have to admit Chad, I don’t take it lightly.

You see, I’ve been in ministry for 10 years and have seen the destruction that pornography causes in men’s and women’s lives. I have friends that work to liberate women and children from the sex slave industry that is built on the foundation of pornography. I will not quote to you the statistics or the studies, you can read them all on your own, but I want to share with you my heart and extend grace to you. Maybe you don’t know how destructive porn is? Maybe to justify your own addiction, you make light of it? Or worse, maybe you talk about it because you think it’s what your fans want to hear? I’m not sure, but I want to assume the best of you.

As men we are called to be responsible. A man who follows Christ takes responsibility. There is nothing funny or cool about pornography. Women have a tremendous dignity, a dignity that should be honored and guarded by men, not exploited and degraded. We are responsible for those men and women as leaders. Chad, you are a leader. Many young men and women look up to you as an example whether you like that or not. St. Paul says, “Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for edifying, as fits the occasion, that it may impart grace to those who hear.” (Ephesians 4:29)

I ask you, and remind myself of it as I ask it of you, to have the courage of your convictions. If you are trapped in bondage to pornography, ask for help. If you are embarrassed or feel guilty about some of things you have said, let’s repent and do better. Women deserve better, God deserves better, and as an adopted son of God, you deserve better too Chad. I wrote this because I care about you bro. I hope it can be an encouragement to you. If not, and you think I’m completely off-base, please resolve to pray for me. Please see that I wasn’t throwing stones at you or judging your heart, only God knows a man’s heart, but I can’t let a brother in Christ actions go unchecked, especially when it is hurting so many.

John converted to Catholicism in 1999 after a very prodigal lifestyle. It is from this place of brokenness that he shares what Christ has done in his life. He received his degree in classics and theology from Xavier University. Working with FOCUS at Colorado State for 4 1/2 years has made him passionate for the work of the New Evangelization. Currently John and his wife of 9 years, Lisa, live in Fort Collins, Colorado, with their five children. You can follow him on Twitter @johnleyendecker

A TrueMan’s Marriage

I just learned that February 7-14 is National Marriage Week.  I guess it’s fitting, with Valentine’s Day and all those commercialized red hearts.  Sort of cliche, if you ask me.  But, nonetheless, it is a real thing.  Even the US Catholic Bishops are behind this.  I’m putting this out now, a few days ahead, so you can get thinking, planning, and doing!

I’m all for marriage.  It is an incredible blessing to be a married man.  It challenges me, no doubt… but at the end of the day, and hopefully at the end of my life, I will be sanctified because of it.  There’s really nothing like giving your whole self to someone else for your entirety here on earth.  Something to ponder, for sure.

To consider where you are with things in your marriage, or if you aren’t married, to maybe consider what you want in your future marriage, here’s a blurb from the USCCB website on National Marriage Week:

February: A Time To Celebrate Love And Marriage

It’s the month of romance! Here are a couple February events to celebrate love and marriage:

Abortion – The Problem is Men

Did you know that we have a holocaust taking place in our country?  It’s happening in every state, and it is legal.  4,000 human lives are being destroyed each day, and the courts support this innocent slaughter of human life, and we’re supposed to go along with it.  Tax dollars, government subsidy, lobbyists, pharmaceutical companies, healthcare; they’re all wrapped up into it.  It’s called Abortion.

It is unfathomable that we allow abortion, especially knowing all we know about it.  There are countless facts, statistics, and logical arguments why abortion is murder, but I’m not going to get into any of those.  I’m going to concentrate on the real problem.  The problem with abortion is men.

Why?  Plain and simple.  85% of all abortions taking place in America are performed on single women.  That means that out of the 4,000 babies that were murdered today, 3,400 of those women who had an abortion were not married, and as many of you know, they feel they have no way out.  When single women are out sleeping around, who are they sleeping with?  Males.  Who gets them pregnant?  Males.  (Yes, God plays a huge part in the creation of that life, too.)  The facts continually lead back to the actions of the men.

If a woman is married, in a safe environment and protected, she isn’t likely to get an abortion.  Facts are facts.  These women feel led, protected and provided for, thus they welcome a new child.  Women who aren’t, don’t.  Men – when are we (as a gender) going to stop being selfish and self-serving and start protecting and cherishing women?  If you’re not married to her, you have no right to her – don’t touch!  She’s not there for your pleasure.  Serve her!  Take care of her!  Love her!!!

I heard a story today of a 20-year-old single woman who recently found out she was pregnant.  The sperm donor (best way to describe him… he isn’t married to her, isn’t her boyfriend, wasn’t even really her friend, just a “meaningless” hookup) told her “I’ll pay for everything.  I’ll even give you a ride and drop you off.  It’ll be fine.”  Class act, right?  Is the problem the baby?  CERTAINLY NOT!  Is the problem the young woman?  Not really, although she plays into the equation.  The problem is the man.  I hate referring to this sort of male as a man, because he most definitely is not living like one.

Men – abortion is only available because we allow it to be… because, in some totally screwed up way, we necessitate it by our actions.  Don’t be fooled, abortion is not about women’s health, women’s bodies, or women’s choice.  That’s a huge load of garbage.  And listen, I’m not saying that women don’t have anything to do with it, certainly they do, but the responsibility is on us.  Abortion will cease when men stop sleeping around, stay faithful and monogamous, and stop allowing the abuse, assault and murder of innocent babies.  The time is now, brothers.

TrueMan up!

Men, and Virtue, and How to Attain It

I wrote an article for “Made in His Image” ministry on men and virtue.  Typical stuff for TrueManhood, but something that Maura’s readers might not get a lot of.  To help support her and what she’s doing, please click the link to take you to there.

“Men, and Virtue, and How to Attain It” – CLICK THIS LINK

What MIHI is all about is helping women who struggle with eating disorders and/or who were victimized by abuse.  There is currently no other Catholic organization specializing in inpatient medical care for the healing of women, and Maura is working on creating this much needed resource.  I greatly applaud Maura for her efforts.  The issue of eating disorders and abuse can go hand in hand.  For countless numbers of women, young women specifically, a lack of self-worth can spur into many psychological, physical, emotional and spiritual issues.

For men, the issue that is constantly looming over us is the issue of sexual integrity, mostly dealing with pornography.  Not every man struggles, but just about every man did, does, or will.  For women, one main issue (compared to men’s issues with pornography, lust, etc.) is self-esteem and eating disorders, most of the time stemming from abuse of some kind.  Not all women struggle with this, but many do and more will if nothing is done about it.

I plan to write an article soon on the problems that women face when they fail to find their value from the proper source.  Watch for that soon.  You’ll be seeing more about MIHI on TrueManhood.com in the future.

TrueMan up!

Catholic Men’s Blog, Back Up and Running!

With great excitement, I write to let everyone know that TrueManhood is back up and running!  After a break for over 2 months due to a website hack, we were finally able to remove all the malware and are back at it.  Thank you to the hacker for allowing me to learn about website security a little bit more and about ways to protect my website from future hacks.  I pray for you and hope for your sake, that  from now on, instead of hacking my website, that you actually read it.

Many things have taken place in the world of Catholic men’s ministry, in the Catholic Church, in the pro-life battle and in America and we are sorry that we’ve missed it.

More to come soon on the fight against pornography, cultural manliness, and the culture of death!

TrueMan up!

“The Playboy Club” is Bombing!!!

Here is an update from Executive Director Dawn Hawkins of The War on Illegal Pornography on NBC’s “The Playboy Club”.  Great news!

“NBC and Playboy were ALMOST convincing last night as they struggled to portray that life as a bunny was everything BUT being treated as an object to be exploited by men. This week, the episode followed the bunnies and their opportunity to be featured on the cover of Playboy magazine.

The bunnies were asked why they wanted to be the new cover girl. I found the answers almost comical with responses like, “In my bunny suit, I’m in total control,” or “I want to show people that I can do big things,” and “I always dreamed of finding some place where I belonged… so, here I am.”

What type of woman would buy into that? Playboy doesn’t show the world that these women are smart and independent.Instead, they show women that their role is to just be a visual, sexual object to be used and discarded by men.

This has been Playboy’s stance on women since their first issue in 1953. We recently found this text from the first issue. “If you’re a man between the ages of 18 and 80, Playboy is meant for you… We want to make it clear from the very start. We aren’t a ‘family magazine.’ If you’re somebody’s sister, wife, or mother-in-law and picked us up by mistake, please pass us along to the man in your life and get back to your Ladies Home Companion…”

Playboy has made it clear that their brand is not about making the world a better, more accepting place for women. It was a man’s world and that is exactly how they want “The Playboy Club” on NBC to be – a man’s world where women just look pretty and keep the scotch pouring.

Since our efforts last week of contacting advertisers, already SEVEN companies have pulled their ads and refused to support the Playboy brand – Kraft, Sprint, Lenovo, UPS Store, Subway, PF Chang’s China Bistro and Campbell’s Soup.

The show also bombed in their ratings – a 19% decrease from their already low ratings last week! We see this as a huge victory and are continuing the effort this week. The contact information for the current advertisers is updated on www.CloseTheClubOnNBC.com. Contact these companies weekly and tell them how exploitive and objectifying “The Playboy Club” is towards women and why it should be closed!”

Just for Laughs – No More Sports in Cleveland

As NFL football nears, I had to post this.

My family is from the Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania area.  My family, for generations now, has always been Steelers, Penguins and Pirates fans.  This video about Cleveland is especially funny to us and I couldn’t help but pass it along.  I hope you have as great a laugh as I had!

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