Are You a Supertasker?

Supertasker; have you heard this word yet?  I’ve only lately come across this newly “invented” conjecture.  (I like conjectures, especially those of an “invented” nature… TrueManhood, TrueMan, TrueMen, etc!)  I read about supertaskers in an online article.  The context of the word stems from the arguments about the potential success that an individual has while using a cell phone while driving, but it can also be used to describe people who can successfully do two or more things at once.

The findings in the article were pretty incredible and I write about this topic today to encourage you to make sensible and safe decisions when it comes to your cell phone use while driving.  Remember – as men, we are called to care for those around us in all we do.  The research shows that most people have problems with reaction time to braking, following distance and memory details of what took place during phone calls.  My encouragement stems from this finding, which held substantial evidence for the cause against driving and talking.  Many men believe that they are indestructible.  Many men believe that the “common finding” doesn’t apply to them, that they are somehow superior to the average Joe.  In this case, the research shows that most of us (I’m assuming I’m in this category, too) simply lose driving proficiency while on the phone.  Are you willing to risk the life of another human being, maybe even your girlfriend, wife or child, in order to take that call?  It just doesn’t make sense to push it.

Now, I’ll admit, I talk on the phone while I drive.  Where I think I’m different than most people (I’m NOT saying I’m a supertasker) is that I put driving first and the phone call second.  I’m aware of what’s going on, checking my mirrors, using my turn signal and so on.  I believe that I do a good job of successfully doing both the driving and the phone call.  However, it begs the question: “Is the phone call worth it?”  I realize that most of us are going to drive and talk.  I get it.  However, please allow me to urge you to set yourself up for success… use a hands-free device if you’re going to do it.  Hands-free doesn’t prevent accidents, but at least you have two hands available.  Pay attention to the road first, and if you must ask the person on the other line to repeat themselves, do it.  Save a life today.

By the way, studies show that only 2.5% of the population are supertaskers.  Most fighter pilots fall into the category of supertasker.

Man up!

Tuesdays with Daddy – A Kid Pouts, but a Man Shouldn’t

This morning, my oldest daughter woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  From her nap this afternoon, she woke up on the wrong side of the bed, again.  Nothing was right for her all day.  She didn’t want to play when playtime was suggested.  She didn’t want to eat, when meals were prepared.  She didn’t want to clean up, she didn’t want to nap, she didn’t want to play, she didn’t want to pray.  Then, to top it all off, a huge snow storm hit our region and is potentially preventing us from getting to the airport and flying to visit family – she was not happy about these details.  She reacts and her reaction is to pout, throw a tantrum and fuss.  A man shouldn’t react that way.

As a grown up (or as a “growing” up), we must realize that our reactions to tough situations should be even keeled.  More properly put, our reactions should be “ordered”.  I recently watched a program on prison inmates.  The inmates seemed pretty calm and easy to get along with while on camera, but unruly, defiant and violent when someone made them mad.  They looked like a little kid who wasn’t getting their way, and anyone in their way paid the price.  A TrueMan reacts differently.

When I was younger, my reactions to tough situations were pitiful.  As I’ve grown older with age, and as I’ve come out the other side of a really bad rage problem, it has become very clear to me that men of virtue, ie: TrueMen, don’t allow their emotions to determine how they act.  TrueMen act out of truth… with responsible reactions.  It’s a good thing to work on.

Man up!

In a World of Negativity, Think Positive

There’s a lot of junk happening lately and lots of bad stuff happening in the world.  We’ve got gigantic problems in Washington, we’re fighting a war in the Middle East where there hasn’t been peace, well, ever.  We’re constantly facing persecution for being “moral, ethical citizens”.  Babies are being destroyed for the sake of convenience and preference.  A good deal of the time, it doesn’t seem like anything is ever going to get better.

Look on the bright side, we have lots to be thankful for.  Someone, somewhere has it much, much worse than you or me.  Belly-achin’ and complainin’ about stuff isn’t going to make anything better.  Yes, there are plenty of really horrible things taking place in our world, but they shouldn’t effect our daily lives from being focused and centered on Christ.

Imagine how badly St. Paul had it… beatings, being stoned, imprisonment and so on!  (Read Philippians 2:12-18.)

Thinking positively helps us take a bad situation and turn it into something decent.  There’s serious power in the reality of the power of positive thought.  I encourage everyone to try three things over the next three days, and see if your attitude changes.

1. Refrain from complaining.
2. Find a positive side to everything.
3. Do something kind for someone else at least once a day.

After three days, after you’ve tried these three things, comment back, or email, or post on Facebook, or wherever.  I want to know what you experienced.

Man up!

The Fight – Clear and Present Danger

I write about “The Fight” a good bit on this site.  I urge men everywhere to realize that we are in a battle for souls.  Most of the time, the battle is spiritual – fighting demons, spiritual unrest and concupiscence.  Sometimes, however, the battle is physical.  In this video, the persecution of Christians shows us that the battle is a clear and present danger.  The persecution of Christians in America is far from as brutal as these persecutions of Christians by Muslims in Nigeria, but still real.  In no way am I attempting to compare the two forms of persecution – clearly, the are different.  However, there’s nothing to say that they can’t become as real in America as they are in other parts of the world.

If you can’t view the video, click HERE for the link.

Men, we MUST first learn what it means to be a man, then jump into action!  We are called to action!  Without TrueMen who step up, lead and fight, mankind will continue to suffer.  We cannot sit around and wait for this sort of hatred to permeate our culture any more.  Step up and do something!  How, you ask?  How can I possibly help these poor, defenseless people in Africa?  Start at home, so that it doesn’t happen here.  I’ve been known to joke on occasion about a “Muslim Invasion”, that I want to be armed and ready to respond to this sort of thing.  It’s not funny any more.  How ready are you if this were to happy in the US?

A note about the traffic on my site: in February 2010, my site was visited by people living in 36 various foreign countries.  6 of those 36 countries were African countries.  This is more real for them than me.

Prove It

There’s an aspect to manliness that I haven’t mentioned on the site, to date, and I want to bring it into the fold.  The aspect of “proving your manliness” is an underlying requirement to achieving TrueManhood.  Throughout all of time, in great civilizations and in small, young boys have had to prove their ability to be considered a man by the rest of the men.  Whether it was killing an animal, conquering a task, going on an adventure or enduring a trial of some sort, young boys weren’t considered a part of the group of men unless they accomplished the task.  Proving one’s manliness is something that we have forgotten in America.

How can we get back to proving one’s manliness, especially in light of the requirements that our world puts out there for guys “to be manly”?  How can we get back to this when what we talk about most on the site, in regards to TrueManhood, is virtue?  I think the answer lies somewhere between the older men (fathers, grandfathers, senior men, etc.)  setting an example of manliness and the young-to-middle-aged-men who have proven themselves as TrueMen to hold a standard of excellence as the requirements for boys and young men who have yet to prove themselves as TrueMen.  Somewhere along the way, we let go of the standard of excellence and now we are faced with the cultural issues of boys acting as if life was a fast action, shoot ’em up movie or the opposite, where we have overly-effeminate males walking around aimlessly.

Why would proving manliness change anything?  Well, if young boys/men knew that they had to prove their manliness (note: this must happen through a rigorous process of proving that their actions are consistently ordered towards the good) before they could ask a girl on a date, before they could have a job, before they could have any responsibility, etc. I think it would greatly change the level of importance put on manliness, which is needed in the worst way.

Man up!

Man-ifesto, Needs Context

A message about the Docker’s “Man-ifesto” came through my inbox today and I wanted to draw some attention to it.  The point of what Dockers is trying to do comes across, however, I think it needs some explanation in order to make it better.  This explanation sets the context of what manhood is, why it is vital and how a man can live TrueManhood.

I really like the parts about gentlemanly behavior.  I tend to believe that chivalry is dying, but I know that it can be resurrected from the dead if men would take a few extra seconds here and there to help women out (it needs to then become a mindset) AND if women allow a man to be a gentleman.  The loss of masculinity in our culture is overwhelming, which is a big reason why I operate this website.  Males tend to give into societal pressures (vanity and pride are big here) and because of the idea of “cultural manliness” (if you don’t know what this is, you need to read more of my writings here!  Use the search box to find CULTURAL MANLINESS!) are often rewarded for doing so.  If you haven’t heard Brad Paisley’s song, “I’m Still a Guy”, he mentions lots of stuff about the decline of masculinity: “These days, there’s dudes gettin’ facials, manicured, waxed and botoxed.  With deep spray on tans, and creamy-lotiony hands, you can’t grip a tackle box.  With all of these dudes linin’ up get nudered it’s hip now to be feminized…” It’s funny, haha, but true.  A way for us to gauge our own behavior and motivations is to look at the most manly men we know.  This doesn’t mean Chuck Norris and Charleston Heston, this means TrueMen, like St. Joseph, St. Thomas More and Jesus Himself!  These men exemplify manliness, they are our guides.

The Dockers Man-ifesto takes jabs at stuff like salad bars, misbehaved children and complacency, but it never answers the question ‘why’.

The term “wear the pants” is typically misconstrued and misused; typically the term means something similar to dominate, or rule over.  This is NOT the role of a man.  A TrueMan leads, yes, but not with an iron fist.  A TrueMan makes decisions, but not by force.  A TrueMan loves and honors and respects.  (In the coming days, as soon as I have my voice back, I’m producing a video talking more about this topic.)

And let’s be clear, the “call to manhood” is to live virtue!  In Latin, virtus means manliness!

I urge men and women to read through Docker’s Man-ifesto and determine what areas should be worded differently if it was the TrueMan-ifesto.  Maybe I’ll do that too, and post my thoughts on it.  Your comments are appreciated.

Man up!

A Fireside "Discussion"

Last night I was up in the mountains with a great group of young Catholics.  We had a great little (easy) hike into a waterfall, played some horseshoes (in the dark) and had a nice meal cooked by our priest.  Somehow [I’m still not certain how exactly] we began discussing the topic of women as altar servers.  I have some pretty firm beliefs on the subject, and stemming from those beliefs, we began to discuss the current state of the Church – all from an opinion/experience standpoint.

I firmly believe that the modern, American Catholic Church is, as I’ve put it before, “by women, for women”.  Yes, the “leaders” are Bishops, Priests and Deacons, but my point is that the lay-portion of the Church is the “for women” part.  This caught some of the young women off guard and immediately put them on the defensive.  This was NOT my intention.  I intended to explain that the problem is not what the women are doing, or their involvement or their faithfulness or anything of the sort… I intended to explain that in order to fix the problem, men must step up and fulfill the call from God to be protectors, defenders, leaders and TrueMen!

Allow me to explain the statement “by women, for women”.  If you look at a typical Catholic parish in America, 80%+ participation and involvement is middle-aged and older women, as well as children.  The liturgies are filled with female volunteers, the events are orchestrated and attended by females and the typical style of worship is geared toward female spirituality – rightly so, since 80%+ in attendance are female.  The problem with this is multi-faceted: First (and FOREMOST) MEN ARE NOT PRESENT.  Men are slacking on their responsibilities and are failing to fulfill their calling as men.  Secondly, when men fail to fulfill their role, women tend to step in and attempt to fulfill the men’s role for them.  This doesn’t work because the male role(s) are meant to be fulfilled by men, and women simply can’t fulfill (rightly) a man’s role.  In the same way, a man cannot successfully fulfill a woman’s role.  If this occurs, the relationships and the fulfillment of the responsibilities are skewed, or disordered.

Another part to the problem is the idea of, an oxymoron, “The Fatherless Family”.  If men are non-existent in the Church, the Church (which is similar to a family unit) will suffer greatly.  This, in my opinion, is the current state of affairs.  The solution to these problems is men stepping up, leading and fulfilling their responsibilities.  As God commanded Adam in the garden, modern men must “shamar” the garden – they must protect, defend and cultivate their world.  My hope is that men begin to learn what it means to live a truly manly lifestyle, within the context of the Life of Faith, as fathers, husbands, sons and friends and that the Church can return to a well-ordered way of operating.  More to come on this.

Disclaimer: This is a generalization.  There are many men, in many parishes, in many dioceses, that are fulfilling their responsibilities and are living well-ordered lives.  There, the Church is strong.  There, the Church is thriving.

Man up!